10 Positive Break Up Quotes And What We Can Learn From Them

by Eddie Corbano

369

It’s time for another “quotes” article.

This time it’s going to be a collection of some of the most inspiring break up quotes.

What is it that is so fascinating about break up quotes anyway?

First of all, they help us to realize that we are not alone out there. People have suffered from broken hearts back through hundreds of years.

Thinking that you are alone with your break up is not as absurd as many of you perhaps might think. One of the main characteristics of break ups is that we are overcome with overwhelming loneliness. Knowing that other people have had this problem too, and survived, gives you comfort and strength to hang in there.

On the other side, it’s always helpful to see another angle. Artists especially seem to have a different view of the world and life – their gift is to enliven the unaware. They help us to understand what we may already know in our minds, but the feelings in our heart resist believing.

So, I’ve collected the 10 most inspiring break up quotes for you, which not only sound good, but actually make you feel better and more positive about the future if you are going through a break up right now.

Here they are:

The 10 most positive and inspiring break up quotes:

“‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”

—Alfred Lord Tennyson

Everyone who has suffered from a broken heart at any time has heard this quote. Unfortunately it does not give comfort at the beginning, only years later will you realize its profoundness and value.

When you understand its true meaning, then you’ll know that you’ve overcome your break up or divorce.

It is one of my favorite break up quotes.

“If you really love something set it free. If it comes back it’s yours, if not it wasn’t meant to be.”

—unknown

I heard this the first time in the movie Indecent Proposal. It illustrates the necessity of detachment, of “letting go” after a break up.

If you can let go, you will receive.

“You have to forgive to forget, and forget, to feel again.”

—unknown

There is no moving on without forgiveness, and more importantly: there is no new beginning while carrying “old emotional baggage”.

“Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart do not know how to laugh either.”

—Golda Meir

Experiencing the negative emotions is part of life. Only if we are able to go through them with our full consciousness can we also appreciate and benefit from the positive ones.

“Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.”

—unknown

Sometimes relationships can’t be fixed. That is when it’s better to move on. Sad, but very often true.

“Some people think that it’s holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it’s letting go.”

—unknown

Only when you are able to completely detach yourself, can you be free. After a break up, and elsewhere in life. Be a leaf floating in a river, not knowing where it might take you. This is true freedom.

“The loss of love is not nearly as painful as our resistance to accepting it is.”

—Tigress Luv

Acceptance is one important step in healing from a break up. This is part of the painful first phase.

“I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry, I’m going to let you go in style, and even if it kills me – I’m going to smile.”

—Lone Star

This is actually some great break up advice in two ways: first you are not being needy in front of your Ex, you demonstrate strength and your Ex may wonder if s/he has made the right decision.

Also, constant smiling despite the fact that you feel terrible is a great way “to trick” your mind. By smiling, the body sends signals to the mind that you are happy, even if you are not. Eventually the mind WILL accept the state of the body.

This is simple neuro-linguistic programming.

“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.”

—M. Kathleen Casey

This is a great one.

It means that you have the choice to accept the pain and not allow it to turn into suffering.

One of the main reasons that mental pain turns into suffering is continual mental reasoning. We can break that vicious cycle by learning to control our thoughts.

“I don’t miss him, I miss who I thought he was.”

—unknown

It is a great accomplishment to realize that we loved a concept, a picture we had in our minds, rather than the person himself. When we break up, it’s this concept we miss, and what causes the pain is the failure of the same.

The minute we realize this, we can kick our Exes from the pedestal.

These were some of the best inspirational break up quotes I could find; I hope you’ve enjoyed them.

They teach us about detachment, the necessity to forgive and let go, to live life to the fullest with all its dark sides, acceptance, neuro-linguistic programming, mental control and the existence of false pictures.

All virtues for overcoming a break up, and or that arduous task, I wish you all the best.

Your friend,

Eddie Corbano

My Recommendation For Further Reading:

10 Secrets About Men - Very Recommendable Inside-Tips from Christian Carter
Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends - THE Classic Book About Breakup Recovery
For Men: Getting Your Groove Back After A Breakup - Approaching Women and Getting Physical

5 Must-See Related Posts:

About The Author:

Eddie Corbano is a breakup-coach, relationship-advisor and founder of LovesAGame. He suffered from a devastating break up in 1998. Since then, he dedicated his life to helping others getting the best of this existential experience. The overcoming of a break up is an important step to autonomy and independency. Eddie Corbano developed some new coaching programs, which focus on evolving inner strength and the power to set and reach any personal goal. (Article written on March 3rd, 2008)
Show all posts by Eddie Corbano

Category: Break Up and Divorce
Tags: break up quotes, detachment, inspiration, quotes, romantic quotes, top 10 list

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http://www.gardino.info/ gardino

I love this one…

“You are what you love, not who loves you..”

by Donald Kauffman in Adaptation

Bulls101

I met a girl.. Fell in love with her… she was really rich.. my self esteem was low at the time… I still love her it seems.. shes married.. with a child… I guess I need to forgive and forget… It too shall pass

http://lovesagame.com Eddie Corbano

Gardino, love it, thanks for sharing.

Dawn1e41

If you are a coach then right now I need coaching. My boyfriend works in Iraq and we have been dating for 14 months now. I met him online via an application called tagged on facebook. I knew when I first met him what sort of job he did. When we first me up in person, after months of talking and getting to know each other.My first thoughts were, he wasn’t for me. Something didn’t click straight away like you would expect after talking for a few months. His body shape was too skinny, his height too small, his voice quietly spoken, his personality too quiet. I am loud, argumentative, never wrong lol, likes to dance, loves to be around family and people, need my friends and family at all times unlike him. But now 14 months later, we are both so in love and want to be together and get married etc etc. But…………….
At first I thought I could handle this situation of him being in Iraq and me in England. But how was I to know that 14 months later, I just cannot handle the lonliness each and every night and the weekends without him by my side. I was with my ex for 17 years and I loved doing all the normal family things together like going to the park, swimming, walking, bike riding etc etc. I cannot do a relationship where I have to do this alone and a lot more, like going to parties, dinner invitations, days out, early evening fun, and just being together talking, relaxing, holding hands, sharing each others day, unwinding, unloading problems and being there for one another.
We have or should I say I have decided to call it a day. I love him to bits and I know he loves me too. The sad thing is he cannot afford to leave Iraq yet for financial reasons (he is saving up to to get enough money to put a deposit on house) and that will take him at least 3/4 years. I on the other hand, having been in a relationship where I have had a man around me for 17 years on a daily basis am finding it hard to be on my own for so long at a time. So I have ended it, but because I know we both love each other so much and it is only the lack of a house and money that we cant be together, it is destroying my mind and hurting my heart beyond repair. He cannot afford to leave Iraq for financial reasons and I cannot afford to wait around emotionally for the next 4 years as I cannot sit here night after night alone and wanting him here and a normal family life for him, his kids, me and my kids. please give me a quote that will give me peace of mind and a way of looking forward and not backwards, x x

http://www.hotalphafemale.blogspot.com Hot Alpha Female

Hey Eddie,
These quotes are great and they really help when going through breakups.

I think one of the hardest things to cope with in a breakup is that sense of lost hope.

Finding daily inspiration and finding meaning in the journey is what keeps you going. I think its essential in the healing process.

Some of the quotes that i found helped me when you most needed it were

“Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds.

It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves” – Sidney and Suzanne Simon

“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled.

For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” – Scott M Peck

“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” – Helen Keller

Hot Alpha Female

http://www.hotalphafemale.blogspot.com
http://lovesagame.com Eddie Corbano

Hey HAF,

Thanks for these great and inspiring break up quotes, I like the Helen Keller quote, wonderful, especially when we keep in mind was she was going through in her life.
Juan G

hank you so much, I think is such a relief to find some articulate way to find your mistakes and needs when your heart is broken. Many of the points in the article make me realize where are my mistakes, and how much I need myself in this moment to overcome how I feel, instead of sitting and continue dueling, I need my energy in my own ambitions and needs. I thank you so much for putting this together for people like me, looking for some answers in this roller-coaster of feelings. I have never read about this before, I thought the process was something natural and evidently sad, but certainly there is a pattern of actions that we take, and when you see them from other eyes different of those of yourself and your friends is so healthy for the mind and the heart to find some clear points of where you are and how can you grow to be better. I lost the love of my life because my gut instinct told me that I needed to marry someone else, someone even more articulate for me, I took the decision and is being the toughest decision of my life, is not easy to understand it, even for me, but I know that with my lost, I have also a lot more to win, I took my chance, and now I am dueling in accepting it, but she started going out with someone else immediately after we broke up, which tells me somehow, I was right in my doubts. Thanks again for the article, is so good to understand my weaknesses and my pain.
With all my gratitude. Juan G
Briget E.

Hi Eddie,
I recently found your website and reading your comments and the articles have given me a strong sense of peace. Like you mentioned, I have felt very alone after my recent breakup. I’m beginning to understand that despite my initial feelings of disempowerment and lack of control. I can control how I heal myself. Thank you for this website. Please continue to write inspiring articles. Sincerely,
Briget E.
linda

Thankyou for this advice, however i am still not able to live without him even though he cheats and lies we have been together 30 years i cant live with him or without him.
lost child

thank you so much eddie. i am going through a tough time with my boyfriend and i’m not sure if we will end or not. but this has definitely put me to east. thank you so much.
tatyana

“everyone and thing counts when it comes to love”
http://myspace.com/__msdee__ Dolores Fleming

“Beautiful liars, speak the language of broken promises……fluently” -Dolores Fleming.
Vishi

I am very upset with my breakup. But your these inspirational quotes encourage me to live again
http://lovesagame.com Eddie Corbano

@Vishi

Thank you Vishi, I’m glad the quotes helped you.
Sarah

Thank you Eddie.
http://lovesagame.com/the-secret-how-to-get-over-a-break-up/#comment-3590 bell81

These are 2 quotes that have really hepled me deal with my break up. hope it helps others:

“To get something u never had, you have to do something you never did. When God takes something from your grasp, he’s not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better. The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.”

“There comes a point in your life when u realize, who matters, who never did, WHO WON’T ANYMORE, who always will. So, don’t worry about people from your past, there’s a reason why they didn’t make it to your future”

Ramon

These are some really nice quotes… I am in my late 20s and my fiancee just called off our wedding which was suppose to happen a month and a bit from now.

It was over something very very stupid/silly/immature on her part and after begging and pleading her not to throw away 8 years of being together she said it was something she had to do for HER. We were also engaged for 4 years with no breakups/infidelity that i know of in between and made major sacrifices to be together in first place.

Well just wanted to say that these quotes will help me because I will read them everyday until she is a distant memory.

I hope the women here realizes that there are still men out there who are willing to offer their hearts unconditionally. Unfortunately, their numbers are dwindling because of selfish “girls” who don’t realize their rarity until it’s too late.

Christine

My boyfriend of nearly three years just dumped me. Though it’s the second time’s he’s broken up with me, this time it really felt permanent. I had already painted all these pictures of our future together, and they were all shattered when he told me that he didn’t love me the way he should. I have very low self-esteem as it is and his leaving me just might kill me it seems. He longed for freedom to party and have fun, and the possibility that he might be out there in the world doing God knows what with God knows who tears me to pieces. I just wish there were some graceful words that could undo this hold he has on me of which he doesn’t deserve. I know it’s worthless to hate and I know it’s worthless to long for someone who has never and will never long or love you but… all I can say is that I’m weak. I simply don’t know how to move on or even how to love again. I’m afraid I never will.

http://intensedebate.com/people/TatisHeart2525 TatisHeart2525

Hello Chrisitne, __ I feel your pain, I have been there and let me tell you one thing. You have to except and love yourself with or with out an significant other. It looks to me that he is the one who lucked out! lol You are smart and have alot to offer. I remember my last break up, it left me tainted. However, those 3 years taught me something about myself and who I want to be. I grew, I learned, and I wont stop loving just because I have been kissing a few frongs, and havent met my prince lol! I cried, laughed, and most of all prayed. I started taking care of myself again, enjoying my favorite hobbies, and even got back to writing love poems. Everybody goes through a healing process, it makes you stronger. But most of all makes you realize what it is to love you all over again. If it didnt work out, it was probadly for a good reason. Dont dwell on the past, instead rejunvinate yourself and look forward to the future. We all deserved to be loved, and most importantly learn to love ourselves. Dont ever let go of that. I hope this helps, take care and good luck.

Luisa

“Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.”
“I don’t miss him, I miss who I thought he was.”

Great quotes Eddie!

Let me share one to help us during tough times:

” It is not your emotions that create your actions; rather,
it is your actions that create your emotions.
The great secret of Life is that we change our behavior through action and not by mastering feeling.”

I didn’t quite get this at first, but later on I understood: to just Be.
Luisa

@Christine –

@ Christine:
We have a similar situation – It was our second and what I felt was the final breakup with him too. I envisioned a beautiful future together with him, and I really thought he was The One.
Hang in there, it’s perfectly Ok to feel the pain.

Be thankful he was honest & showed his true self to you now rather than in the future where it could cause more pain for the both of you. This period in your life is only temporary. You may not see it now, but you’ll come out of this experience a stronger woman & see the reasons why this happened.

Life goes on. Rebuild. Your Life is Yours. Create it as you want it to be. That’s the great thing about Life – is that we CAN choose to be Happy. Remember to Love yourself!
Diana

hey christine, wow you inspire me, i say that because i know you will be stronger than you ever think u will be. in the end hes just another guy and there are so many, but besides that you dont need a man, you need yourself you have to get away fro a while! take a trip and have fun! dont let him bring you down if you keep worrying about him you will never move on! you need to accept that he was not meant for you! eveything happens for a reason and this was right! let him be! if he wants to be a slut then so be it, your ovioulsy better than that, but i know u dont wanna hear this cuz u probibly already have, but u need to sleep at night thining about what your gonna do tommrow, take a jog?starts a new class? take lessions? DO IT! do things to replace the wasted time you spent with him!!! GOOD LUCK GIRL!!!
Le

#2

“If you really love something set it free. If it comes back it’s yours, if not it wasn’t meant to be.”

—unknown

Hey Eddie –

This quote is from the movie, “Butterflies are Free.” from the late 60′s
… don’t use cheap tissues while watching this tear-jerker or you’ll have 3rd degree friction burns on your shchnaz by the time it’s over…
Cindy

@Christine –
I know exactly how you feel. My finace a four yr relationship ended things three months before the wedding. he blamed me saying that i pushed him away cause i kept asking him if he was ready, he told me i needed to work on myself that i was to impatient and not understanding enough. Now one month after our offical break up I found out that he’s been seeing someone else since before we broke up. He’s taken her on a fancy trip and she’s 15 yrs older than me and has a kid!! Iam a reck, i was starting to move on and now this! its like i have to start all over again. I want to hate him but its still hard to!! I feel you!!
http://www.rebeccamae.wordpress.com Becca

Love the quotes, and very true.
Oh, and to let you know, #8, the I’m gonna smile quote, is actually the chorus in the song, “Smile” by a country band called ‘Lonestar.’ Just thought I’d let you know.
farfromhome

Hi Eddie,

After having a long distance relationship for a year I moved to where my bf lives so I could be with him. Its 3000 miles away from my family, and friends. 2 weeks after I moved here he broke up with me. I dont know what to do because I just moved here and dont know anyone. I dont want to tell my friends and family because I will look like a fool. Please help-
http://shortjokes4u.blogspot.com short jokes

I liked all the quotes.It helped me to console.thanks alot for sharing ..looking for more inspiration.
thanks
Brenda

Hi, my boyfriend left me just like that I went to work and by the time that I came back from work he was gone, took all his shit and left, and this happened last week and 7 weeks apart from our wedding. I´m ok… doing ok… but I have learned that no one can treat me like, that life is too short to be crying, upset, mad or unhappy for no one!…. this time is going to be for me after 3 years of a relationship and for everyone just read the following quote:

“I don’t miss him, I miss who I thought he was.”
Briget

@Brenda – I’m in awe of your strength and courage, Brenda. It’s been one year since my bf broke up with me, six months before we planned to marry and while there are days when I still feel sad, in my heart I’m beginning to realize that he wasn’t who I thought he was. I’m healing…day by day I’m getting stronger.

My thoughts are with you. Take care of you!

Briget
Brenda

@farfromhome –
Hi farfromhome, I know how is it feels… I’m mexican and I have been away from my family and friends, my country, my city, my people for 3 years and just like I said he just left me leaving a note, and I’m by myself in a different country. What you can do is keep living your life, go out by yourself meet people, God has something better for you out there… be strong and if there is anything that I can help you with this is my email brenda.perez@softtek.com. God always has something BETTER for all of us, there is always a reason and why is happening all this… but what it doesn’t kill you it make you stronger =D.
Brenda

Hi!!…. the only person who can make you feel better it’s you… and that’s it… wake up every morning thinking that today is going to be better than yesterday and that you are happy, at the end you are going to believe it and you will feel happy… I know it looks like there is anything that can make you feel better but it is… that what I say to my self every morning… and it works but it’s because I want to be happy and I’m going to be happy…and that’s the only thing that I want for me… and if he wasn’t my happiness it’s because there is someone that it is going to be… I’m just going to be patient and let God send me the right men for me…be strong… keep living …same if you need anything just send me an email =D…. brenda.perez@softtek.com

and remember… “Today is going to be so much better than yesterday”

Brenda
Cindy

@Brenda -

Wow! I wish I had your determination and strength. My fiance dumped me about a montha and a half ago and I still cant find the strength to even stop calling him. I call him he doesnt even call me! He’s going out and partying and I feel guilty about thinking about having drinks with someone else. I cant wait to leave work so that I can get out of here and cry. My closeest friends are like 5 hrs away! So really I just stay home and try to sleep or occupy myself with my nieces and nephews. I think my life was set. Now Iam 27 and have to start over again. Its awful I wish i could think more like you!
Briget

@Cindy –
Hi Cindy,
One year ago, I was exactly where you are now. It was the most painful experience of my life. Like you, I would look forward to leaving work so that I could cry as I drove home. There were times that I couldn’t hold back the tears and would cry at work. Physically, I lost a ton of weight and looked unhealthy. Although I still love and miss him, I will never darken that door again. I just got tired of him rejecting me, each time I felt worse about myself. It took about six months for me to feel better.

Cindy, I know that it hurts like hell, but you will feel strong. You will survive this!
Brenda

Hi… I just dont see why you should feel like that… I’m 27 too and my ex-fiance is 24… and we start to date when he was 21 and I was 24, and I feel great… I’m doing great… I’m about to go to home right now I’m in Mexico with my family because I needed to be with my people but I’m ready to go to home and live my life; happy and ready to keep living my life… =D
Liz

Hi guys,
thank u for some really inspirational quotes…I've been finding the last while almost unbearable and they have given me the first real glimmer of hope…its been a month since my boyfriend broke it off with me with which are officially the most horrible words ever 'I have fallen out of love with you'..funny how the person who's said the most beautiful things in the world to you like 'I love u'..'you are not only the love of my life but my best friend also'…'you are the woman i want to marry and spend my life with' can suddenly tear you heart out…he basically blamed me for our break -up..a few issues I had had with his behaviour like me coming down every wkd to see him and me wanting him to come visit me in college one wkd a month …he said 'i was infatuated with you but these few non fixable things changed me'…I've been left devastated – feeling like its all my fault and that if I'd been a bit more reasonable we'd be together..but really trying to believe these quotes hopefully I will believe

Ash

I know how you feel. My ex boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago and blamed everything on me. I felt terrible…until I realized one day that it wasn't my fault. It takes two to end a relationship and if he really loved you, he wouldn't have left you and would try to work through it. My ex has issues that I don't know about, and he probably doesn't even know about himself. But he will reflect and realize that the issues are his own.

Liz

thanks for your support Ash – I know I've got to realise it wasn't all my fault – It was such a knock to the self esteem that I was questioning myself worth – I am feeling if only I was more understanding supportive but ya I do think your right if he really loved me he would have wanted to sit down and work through it…that's what I wanted to do..really did…but he just didn't think I was worth it….

farfromhome

Hi brenda-thanx for your support! I am trying my best to deal-it is very hard. Iam just trying to keep busy with work-he told me he wants to be friends-i told him ok, but now i am just angry and annoyed with him everytime we talk so i keep it short. I need to cut it off somehow but its hard cuz he wants to be friends. I cant believe what you had to go through!! Sounds way worse than mine..i hope to feel like u someday soon..
Chelsea

Hey everyone,
My boyfriend of about 2 and a half years just randomly dumped me out of nowhere, and we still talk, we "text" and he said he needed space but that we are going to get back together..so i told him i will wait for him. and we still hangout once a week and when i bring it up he just says he needs his "chill" time and we are young so im a freshman in college and hes a senior in high school so hes getting that whole "im graduating" phase and hes going to college 45 min away so not that bad..and he says we are goin to be together when hes in college…hes still nice to me but we just barely talk. and also he has not been with any other girls or even trying (his friends and him have told me haha) and neither am i..so im just waiting and he knows ill always be here..its been 2 months now and its driving me crazy..im so in love with him..and he seems like we arent "completely" done so im waiting around BUT im still having fun and stuff..and i feel like hes the one and he has told me before he feels the same way…everything was soo perfect. so what do i do?? i need advice!!! =]
Chelsea

also he needed a break because i was EXTREMELY jealous..id check his phone while he was sleeping and question every text to any girl..and one night he went bowling with girls and there was pics of him n them (not bad) and i blamed him for cheating on me ..and i said hes cheating on me. (and he NEVER has and NEVER will..) i was just crazzzy. hes such a great honest guy and now i see that hed never hurt me so i feel awful..i was clingy and jealous and controlling and now ive changed and im a better person now! so it upsets me. i dont want him to remember me as that.
Cindy

Chelsea, first off people dont change in the span of two weeks! I believe youve realized your mistakes and thats great for you. But your very young you dont need to be waiting around for any guy! If he loves you there is no such thing, trust me Im coming out of a 4yr relationship that ended 3moths before our wedding and my ex tells me to wait that we need to fix things on our own first. But its up to you to realize that no person that truly loves youwill ever out you through that. He"s young and once he starts school he's gonna want to date other girls and thats only natural because your both still very young. Take advantage of this and do what makes you happy, dont call him or text him or see him for a while. Once you havent talked to him you'll realize that your ok and dont need to be tied down!
Nic

Hey Cindy- Just wanted to tell you I'm in your shoes! I'm 28 and my ex moved out about a month and a half ago–three months before the wedding. He also said he needed "time" to fix his own problems, etc. and that he didn't want me to wait for him. Long story short, he ended up moving out while I was at my parents' house out of town and sending me a text to say it was over. I know exactly how you feel about the sudden urge to cry at work and sometimes not being able to wait for the drive home to cry! I've made myself go out and join local organizations, meet people, reconnect with my old friends and family… It really takes a lot of effort at first, but it's amazing how quickly you can put your life back together if you really grit it out. I actually forced myself to stop contacting him by taking it literally one second at a time. Each second I didn't call was a small victory. And then I started to realize that I actually feel better NOT talking to him. Contacting him only makes it worse. Much worse.
tatisheart2525

Agreed!!! Here is one for all the ladies that have had there heart broken!! i am sure we all can relate!

"I love to shop after a bad relationship. I don't know. I buy a new outfit and it makes me feel better. It just does. Sometimes I see a really great outfit, I'll break up with someone on purpose."

Rita Rudner
Cindy

Nic, thank you so much for sharing. In a way its nice to know someone else is going through what I am do I dont feel like a crazy person with all these emotions. But I am in a better place now than I was even a week ago! Its sounds crazy I know but Iam no longer obsessing about all the good and awful things that went wrong in the relationship, now Iam focusing on myself and what I want. It does take a big effort, everytime I start to wonder off I stop myself and think of something new I want to try. Every time I think about calling him I think I have nothing to say to him and I dont want to make myself feel bad anymore Iam done with it! So yes I agree with the whole talking to him only makes it worse! I am also doing the whole reconnecting with old friends I even went to a bridal shower this weekend and had fun. I can see the storm withering away now. Thanks to this website and to all the advice Ive received on here. Thanks eddie for this page its a real saver!

http://lovesagame.com Eddie Corbano

You’re welcome Cindy. I’m glad you’re feeling better .

Yes, it takes real effort to escape the vicious cycle of thoughts, but when you do, step-by-step, the real healing will start.

The first step is ALWAYS going no-contact.

Eddie

Cindy

Ok so I have a question, maybe someone can help me. One of my closest friends who knows everything that Ive been going through with my broken engagement and relationship recently announced that her engagement party will be on the same day as my supposed wedding date. Iam upset,for months I've been wondering what I woulld be doing on that dreaded date and now this! I cant be around a happy blissfully in love couple! I mean Im moving forward with my life and Iam doing better but this!!! can someone tell me if Iam overreacting? Please!! Eddie what do you think?

http://lovesagame.com Eddie Corbano

Cindy, if you not feel like going to that engagement party then don't go. A good friend would understand this. I think it's perfectly ok.

On the other hand, maybe it would be a good distraction for you, especially on that date. But you have to decide. Either way, it's ok.

You are not overreacting, this is perfectly normal.

Eddie

http://www.myspace.com/362482493 Summer

Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

I thought this guy was different, and he proved me wrong. But, this quote, helped me the most.
-thankyou; *Summer.
Cindy

Thanks for the advice Eddie. The last thing I want is for people to feel sorry for me, so I think I will go. It will be a good distraction. Besides I shouldnt rain on someone elses parade, thats just selfish!
Maribel

My husband and I were together over 8 yrs, he left me once when we were dating in 03 saying he fell out of love with me. About a year later he saw me again at a club and invited me to eat, I had already gotten over him by that time but beleive me when he left me I went through a horrible depression and thought my life was over. Any ways he started calling me again and inviting me out and slowly I fell for him again. Our relationship was good till we got married March 08, he changed alot, all he cared for was going to the gym and looking good and going out. He didn’t seem to want reasponsibility as a married man and we fought alot about his behavior. I tried to talk things over with him tried to understand what was going on with him but he would just sit there in silence and he ended up leaving me in November because he said we fought too much. Only 8 mths into our marriage and he left me with that excuse. I was torn to pieces the pain was more then I can handle. I tried my best to save our marriage but he just didn’t care to. I decide to give this one guy a chance so I wouldn’t be home depressed like the first time he left me and my husband acted like he was jealous about this guy but still he didn’t care to save us. I only saw that guy for 2 weeks because I couldn’t stop thinking about my husband no matter what. We have been separated for 6 mths now and I’ve seen him a few times and every time I see him I feel like myself again, I feel like that’s where I belong. I recently saw him 2 days ago and we argued we cried and laughed a bit. He told me he left cuz he was fed up with the fighting and he said sorry for all the heart ache he has caused me and that I’m a good person and don’t deserve what he has done to me and that he doesn’t like talking to me because it hurts him to hear my voice and the sadness behind it and that he feels like a coward. After that we went and had a peaceful dinner together. After seeing him I was sad because I still love him and miss him like crazy, but I’ve been feeling somewhat peaceful since then. I guess I just needed to hear an I’m sorry and I realized that maybe deep inside he’s hurting more then me for all the pain he has caused me. I told him that I love him and that I’m here for him if he ever needs someone to talk to and that I wish him the best. Since then I feel like I’m ready to live again and move on, although something inside me tells me he’ll be back. I feeling might be wrong and if it is …that’s ok because God doesn’t put anything in our lives we can’t handle. i love and miss him so much but I can’t drown in this pain forever.

A friend of mine told me…”if that’s the love of your life then keep fighting for him” truth is I have fought alot for him, and all I got was rejection and humiliation. As a human being I can only take so much of that. He is the love of my life but it’s his turn to try if he cares at all.
Nicci

Hey Everyone. I was just reading all the messages and feedbacks that ya’ll were giving and getting and I would like to put my input on a few things.
As I was reading, I saw that somone had said ” You are the only person who can make youself happy.” It’s true. The more you think about the negative, and the past…the more you will be depressed. I was in a relationship for a VERY long time as well…and I thought this person was going to be sitting next to me in a wheel chair one day. Do you know how it feels to feel like “This is my life, and I love it”…and then wake up and have NOTHING? It’s one of the most painful feelings ever. I’m recently from New York, now living in Houston, Tx..but my dad lives in New York, and my EX and I went to new york because my father wanted to meet him. I introduced him to my father, and we had a great time. Talked about having children and getting married. One week after we got home, he dissapeard for days. Like 6 days I heard NOTHING from him. I called every jail, every hospital, contacted his parents, friends, relatives..and NOTHING. =( I was depressed…sick…I was going to call the cops until his BEST FRIEND got intouch with me and told me “He just needs a little time”. So then I realized that everyone was pretty much ” on his side”….keeping things from me. I started feeling like maybe this was my fault. “What did i do”…and then, he tells me that he met somone else and that he wasn’t inlove with me. Left. Walked out of my life, and left. Goodbye. Our apartment. Our future. Our dog. Our love. Our friendship. To nothing. =( Impossible is how I felt. 3 weeks later, I was hospitalaized because I was so depressed, I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. I was having bad nightmares. I lost 20 lbs in a month. =( I was sick. Some people are different. Dr told me I had anexiety attacks, from being away from him. I got used to him being with me everyday…and then he was gone. Almost as if he died….Or..I died. =(
4 Years later, I am married to a wonderful man. I have a 2 yr old daughter….I look back now, and realize…He didn’t leave me. I left him. He is a loser, an asshole, and MAY GOD have mercy on his soul when he passes, because I sure as he** won’t. I seen this man at a bar about a month ago and he was doing everything he could to try to take me home that night with him. Disgusting is what he is. I was young, dumb, and I thought I knew what LOVE was. How stupid of me. Start with yourself. Friends helped me out a lot too. I began going to the beach and movies and doing things to keep my mind off of him. It worked, and I am so glad I am the person I am today. Because of “Rey”…I am a stronger women. I now have a LIFE with my friends and husband. I don’t exclude my loved ones. They are the ones you need the most. Hope this helps anyone. =)
Angelica

Nicci, THANK YOU so much for sharing your story! You give me hope. My story is very similar to yours…one day we were talking marriage and baby names, two days later he blind-sided me with “I don’t love you.” That was 6 months ago. I’m doing very well, and actually believe this experience has made me a stronger woman. I believe I had to go through this to appreciate a good relationship and to figure out who I am and what I need in a partner. I discovered strength I never knew I possessed. I learned that no matter how independent I may be, I could have never gotten through it without the support of my friends and family. However, I admit I’m still anxious at the idea of “what if I NEVER meet anyone else and I’m single the rest of my life?”
Amy

Everyone of us experienced loosing someone you loved in different ways. It’s hard to move on at the first time of your break up but once you think the positive ways of letting go you will tell to yourself “I made the right decision”. For six months of our break up I thought I havent move on but through the helped of my friends who knows how I’ve been affected, for so many cries that I made, for the prayers that I do, I can say things changed. I’m a more stonger person now. He helped me to look more positively in life . Loosing him is not my lost but made me as a better person. Accidentally, we met again in the mall, we only says “hi” and “How are you?”. I didnt had any choice to back off because I’m already near in the cashier lane, I thought my heart will still beat fast when I’m seeing him again, but what I feel is a cold feeling that he never exist anymore in my life. After that incident, I’m happy to be myself again. Few days before I met him again, I already started to have date, I believe I can also find someone who belong to me.
Cindy

Nicci, thank you so much for your story it gives me hope. If you dont mind me asking how old you were when your break up happpened. Iam 27 and I thought yeah this is it I couldnt have been happier,it was three months before our wedding and he told me that he couldnt marry me. Its not that I dont love you he told me its just that we arent ready. Then I thought ok well at least we will still be together but nope! He wanted to completly break up with me. Then he started dating a woman 15yrs older is he 23 she is 40!! i guess she was a MILF! He started talking to this woman while we were still living together, since jan. of this yr and they immediatley started dating after our break up and I confronted him about her several times and he would always tell me they were just friends that she gave him advice and that she was way to old with kids and what was he going to do with her. Well I talked to the 40yr old and she told me that yes they were going out! I told her all about our relatioship and she was surprised she didnt even know his real age! So after that she still continued to see him and he told me she was just a distraction so he could not think of what he had done to us. I would call him everyday and he would tell me that one day in the future we would be together but he needs time to think and finish school first! Finally I’ve given up on him and have accepted that its over and it will never be again. Iam just sad and hurt still cuz we had an amazing relationshop for four yrs but I know I wil get through this its just hard. I know I have to take things one day at a time, its been 2 and a hlaf months and I do feel better, but I still break down every once in a while. Hopefully this is just a phase that I will pass soon.
Bonnie

Thank you all for leaving your comments and personal stories here. Even though we are all so different, it’s comforting to see others in this situation being strong, living their life even when it’s difficult.

I can’t even imagine the pain that some of you must be feeling right now, especially the ones who were taken by surprise. I can say with confidence that IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. You were there, it was your significant other who was a coward and walked away instead of working on the relationship.

I am also fresh from a breakup, but I have the luxury of knowing that it would have happened eventually anyway. We were so different, and once he stopped making time for us, it was only a matter of time. I am trying hard to count all the GOOD things in my life, and to look forward to the future.

The quote that has given me strength lately is taken from an old Hebrew story… I hope someone else will take comfort from it as well.

“This too, shall pass”
Kaleen

Cindy, you are still SO YOUNG! I am 47 and just got dumped after 15yrs of marriage so just try to remember how much someone like me wishes she was 27 again… how young that sounds and how so much time is ahead of you. Believe me when I tell you, the 30s are the BEST! I think we both have to realize that if our exes really loved us (the way we deserve and want to be loved), they would not have second thoughts, they would not need “some time,” they would not move out, they would want to be with us all the time! It’s super hard to let that sink in, but don’t you have a little voice inside that tells you this is the truth? I thought my marriage was the best of any of my friends, it was my comfort and joy for many years and yes, I still love him…. but we have to suck it up and live through this sadness and pain and get through to the other side, where hopefully better things await. Are you with me????!
Layla

Hi Girls, I have a story to share as well.
I met my first boyfriend, frst everything when I was 15. We stayed the bestest of friends for 8 years and were madl in love for 6. We had an off and on relationship because I could only put up with so much. I always worked and saved to go and see him in the states, Id stay up late every night in highschool and wake up early just to talk to him.

I spent so much money on him over the years, while he didn’t work or go to school. I dealt with his crazy family and crazy stories along with my family going against me for leaving all the time to go and see him. I sacrificed my entire life for him and I shutted out all my friends. He was my entire life. All that I knew.

I broke up with him a year and a half ago and started dating other guys for the first time in my life. I started drinking and partying and just trying to enjoy my life without him. It was horrible because these guys would say all these nicethings to me then walk out on me every time. I was so hurt but id always turn to him and he’d be there to tell me deserved better. I always believed Id end up with him in the end. I truly believed that. All of last year he was there for me throgh everything that I went through. He always said he wasnt dating anyone or interested or anything.

We got back together in December and i wrote him everyday and called him everyday. I thought everything was ok, but one night I called to say Happy New year, and a girl picked up. She was 15 as i found out on her facebook and he was 22. He was seeing her all year off and on and never mentioned her. He told me to leave him alone and she completely put me down. She told him to shut me out of his life for good or else. And that he did. It killed me.

He was al I ever knew and relied on. For 3 days i thought it was tuesday. I cried my face off, I couldnt sleep, I lost so much weight. It was disgusting. First week of january, I called him and he hung up. Then he called me back and I said “I just wanted you to know, Im done. You go your way and Ill go mine. I wish you the best and I hope your happy.” I havent spoken to him since. Its been 5months and I could not be happier.

I now have a boyfriend who treates me lke a queen. I havent ever been treated this way. I have confidence now and I feel so good about myself. I feel so strong that if anything does happen, Ill be ok. No matter what I will be ok. It makes us stronger. Every experience. Instead of regretting anything, learn from it all and smile. Because it WILL make you stronger and a better person.

God Bless everyone
Amy

Hi girls, I’m happy to know that despite of the sad experienced that we’ve been through were still kicking and alive. Still fighting to move on to the new chapter of life.

Despite of this memories we’re lucky to find someone who will love us in return. This past experience might help us to move on and have a better relationship.

Let us think positivelly that things are happpening for a reason. The choice is in our hands to look forward to the happiness and what you want to be. What important eveytime we fall, you’ll stand and live again. Aja!!!

To let go is not to regret the PAST. Let the past be our guide for the FUTURE.

Thanks Eddie for this website..

Have a nice day to all…

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