Top Menu

5 Reasons Why To Go For A Long Distance Relationship

17.1K Flares 17.1K Flares ×
Go For A Long Distance Relationship

Photograph by istockphoto/humonia

We have all been in this situation – you meet someone very special, you fall in love, everything is perfect. Suddenly, it turns out that this very special someone has to go far, far away for college, a better job, an expedition – you name it.

You then have two choices: breaking up, or to go for a long distance relationship.

I have been receiving many e-mails since posting my article about how to make a long distance relationship work. People have been asking me if they should go for a it or not.

They want to know if it will it turn out well, for how long is it ok, and so on.

I try to answer every e-mail as detailed as possible. But in the majority of cases, my response is usually, “Yes, I would always go for it – if you feel it is special, if you have a clear time frame, if you are willing to follow the rules I’ve stated, and last but not least, if you believe in it.

Many of you have had a failed LDR in your past, so your hopes and expectations regarding those kind of bonds are not high. For this reason, I have decided to list some benefits of a these kind of relationships to make your decision easier, and to give you some hope as well.

You are not alone.

There are hundreds of thousands of working relationships over a long distance around the globe.

I said that I usually always recommend to go for it, however there are a few exceptions.

If the duration of the separation is unusually long, and the chance for monthly meetings is extremely low, it is going to become very hard.

In that case, I recommend to really think it over, especially if you are very young.

I am well aware that it is very difficult to say no to the relationship because of rational reasons, but eventually that would end up being the best decision. Otherwise, it may lead to frustration, anger and pain.

But for now, let’s assume that you have no more than one year or so to go, and you know that you can follow the 10 rules.

Here are the top 5 reasons why you should go for a long distance relationship:

1. Better sorry than safe

There is nothing sadder than a missed opportunity.

A very wise man once said to me, “I never regret things I’ve done, but I regret many things I have not done”.

You never know how things are going to be before you try them. Every single experience, good or bad, enriches your life in some way. They build the foundation for decisions in the future. They make you wiser and build up your self-esteem.

Not to mention that in every missed opportunity, you may have missed the love of your life.

All the good things in life involve a certain risk, but the biggest risk in life is missing out.

Think about that.

2. You gain time for other things

“Finally I can take the Spanish course”.

A LDR isn’t as time consuming as a regular relationship. You can use the free time to reach your personal or job related goals.

You have more time for your career, friends, hobbies and family.

3. It’s the ultimate test of seriousness

“I really mean it baby”. Now you can prove your commitment.

There is no point enduring such a difficult challange if you don’t mean it, and if you are not fully committed.

It just doesn’t work. After a few weeks or months, the first man/woman that comes around that you feel an attraction to will make you forget about your relationship..

So, this is a test on whether or not you are committed and suitable for each other for a long term relationship.

Of course, this only applies to couples who were together before they were separated by distance.

If you’ve met in a chat room, then it’s the other way around.

4. You learn to treasure those rare moments together

Fact is, you’ll probably see each other only 1-2 times a month, if that much. These rare meetings will be an explosion of passion and love. All of the longing will focus into this short meeting.

It’s a good lesson to understand what really matters in a relationship.

5. You really get to know each other

It is much easier, and actually much more natural to get to know somebody through e-mail. All of the outside stuff is left out. It is easier to open up, and you can learn about the inner world of your partner.

No pretending, no beautifying.

This also makes the meetings more intense.

There you have it, some thoughts as to why you should take a chance and go for it.

Please do me two favors.

Tell me your thoughts about this. Have you survived a love over distance? Why would you recommend it? I’m looking forward to your comments.

The other thing is, please participate in the following survey. I’m really interested to see how many of you would go for it again.

(survey closed)

I hope that I gave you some insights which will help you make the decision. Don’t take it too easy, a relationship with miles between you is very hard, but it could give you so much in the end.

Ask me about it!

Your friend,
Eddie Corbano

120 Responses to 5 Reasons Why To Go For A Long Distance Relationship

  1. suu June 15, 2013 at 11:06 am #

    i meet my guy on Facebook, we have been together for more than two years, still we have never seen each other. he lives in us and im in africa, he is a student and works (a total of 16 hrs), he studies and do lots of assignments. he moved to us to do his studies. he doesnt take loan for his education, he pays it, as he learns. so in short he’s very busy. he calls every now and then, as i do too. we chat on Facebook every week, for 1-3 hrs, bt there are times where i dont hear from him for 2 weeks. i know he loves me, but he doesnt make time for me. he is always telling me to be patient that it will be all worth it at the end. may be its cuz he’s busy. i know he loves me but its hard to be in love with the man u’ve never meet. i love him so much, yet i dont know him to well. not enough to marry him he’s planning to come and marry me. is wise to marry him the first time he comes? i dont think it is. i just wanted to get ur perspective in this. email me plis. i wanna know.

  2. Tumisho September 13, 2013 at 1:54 am #

    I am now close to celebrating a year together with my girlfriend and we are enjoying our long distance relationship.The society distorted most people’s reality to believe long distance relationships are just a waste of time not knowing that LDRs are wonderful and everyday its a friday even when my girlfriend is miles away.

  3. Zoe April 14, 2014 at 7:26 pm #

    I have been with my boyfriend for 5 months, we met at work! He had already planned an overseas trip for 5 months before we met! He said he wouldn’t have gone through with it if we had have met earlier but he had everything booked. So I knew what I was getting myself into in a way..At first I thought it was just a bit of fun and nothing would come of it but we actually ended up falling in love! His been overseas for 2 months now and at first he was missing me for the first week calling and texting everyday and now I feel like his forgotten about me to a certain extent! Sometimes his out of reception so we dont talk for a week at a time which is understandable as his on a holiday and I want him to have fun. He has obviously met people while on his trip but a lot of them have been female and photos have been post on Facebook by the girls and certain status up dates that aren’t to my liking! I’m not the jealous kind but I feel myself getting upset! He lied to me about going away for a weekend with 2 girls he had become friends with over there, he said I thought u would get upset. I feel like a different set of rules applies to him and his not being sensitive to my feelings! We don’t really speak as much anymore, we speak every 4-5 days and he seems disinterested and can’t wait to get off the phone (maybe I’m just being a girl and analysing things to much) I don’t want to waste my time if it’s not going to work out! His 24 and I’m 28 so there is a little bit of an age difference in regards to maturity! But at the same time I don’t want to regret if I was to break up with him what could have been! Sometimes I just find it so hard to understand men!!! He says he loves me and is missing me but sometime I wonder! He has never had a girlfriend so sometimes I just think he has no idea of what his saying and how it effects me! His not the type of guy to cheat but when ur having a good time on a holiday drinking and hanging out with the opposite sex things can happen..He says he hasn’t been unfaithful but said if he was he wouldn’t tell me! I don’t know what to think when things like that are said..? My brain goes into overdrive thinking bad thoughts! Help!! What should do?

  4. Betty April 24, 2014 at 8:31 pm #

    I met my boyfriend in university more than 5 years ago. I am from Europe, he is from US. After 6 months together, we maintained a 2 years long distance relationship. He moved to Europe, we got married and lived happily for 3 years. Now, I have to let him go because he is very homesick and feels confused. Now I am considering if continue with a new long distance situation or just be friends and see what happens, since we love each other with all our heart. I am even considering to move to US if there is no other solution.

    This is not the perfect situation. IT’S NOT. But… I don’t regret. I had and maybe I have yet the best love chance of my life and I prefer to have had a 5 year long relationship with him, even with the difficulties and the distances in the middle, than a life without him :-)

    So, just follow your heart and if you take the risk… maybe it will work maybe not, but you won’t spend your life wondering if you missed your soulmate.

  5. Tags May 2, 2014 at 2:28 pm #

    After 8 years together she is moving away she is going because it is been always her dream she says to go back and live in the USA but because of me she shorten the time and she is going now for 7 months.
    I fell into depression already and what made it worst is that she went to the airport already and we say goodbye but because all of her money got stolen at the airport she had to go back and cancel everything and she is staying for one more week I don’t feel like she appreciates the time we have now and I hoped she would stay now didn’t happen also , she keeps saying that she would stay if asked her to she knew I’m never gonna ask someone to stay but when her trip got cancelled couldn’t help myself but ask her to stay she cried and argued and i gave up immediately.
    I’m so sad but I can’t let her know I’d rather be left alone than be the needy gf .
    She noticed that I’m being cold and she is so afraid to lose me but I keep telling her everything is ok.
    I know I don’t have the best attitude but I can’t do the right things and I’m so emotional I hope it won’t take Long

  6. Ericka August 31, 2014 at 11:00 pm #

    Help me to understand and feeling safe the risk…..My hearing boyfriend and I am hard of hearing had long distance relationship for 5 month he live up north in Stockton California and I am south in inland umpire California. We are in love and he works driver truck travels since we first met on tango for a few weeks after we met every Wednesday to get to know each other, it went so smoothes relationships wonderful and I thought he would be take advagative me being a deaf. But he didn’t do this time and he respect to me more than I thoughts and I really appreciate it for offer me an vacation enjoy to get know each other..after awhile then I realized we don’t much talk on the text often before he always text me everyday plus skype too. All suddlenly that he is little change and I busted him act different the way he been worry about his phone is tango talking to him without know me not open up the honest. I would not ask or why or fight no reason…till we went together church…..now I feel something come up that god warn me not to be with him if I believe in gods word that would be risk soon…but help me to understand becuz he said really love me very much…

    What do you think I should or not???

    Thank you

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Long Distance Relationship Tidbits | Long Distance Diva - September 26, 2007

    [...] a long distance relationship but you don’t know if it’s worth it? Eddie Corbano has 5 Reasons To Go For a Long Distance Relationship. Tip number 2 is “You gain time for other things”. While it’s true to some degree, [...]

Leave a Reply

17.1K Flares Twitter 3 Google+ 0 StumbleUpon 17.1K Pin It Share 0 Email -- 17.1K Flares ×