This sounds very familiar. I was in a similar situation with a 29-year old who had a 4-year old daughter, had always been enabled by her parents and has never had to take care of herself. When we “fell in love” I quickly fell into bad habits of giving too much, and while she enjoyed the things that I did for her and her daughter, ultimately she decided that she wasn’t ready for a relationship, despite telling me that she wanted to marry me. Because things ended so civilly between us, I have thought about maintaining contact but found it to be too painful since I still want more. My advice is to back off for a while and see how you feel in a month or two. You have to also consider her child and not wanting to hurt her anymore.

I’m so glad I found this website.
I split with my now ex 6 months ago. Can you imagine he’e been yo-yo-ing me around, claiming he wanted to be friends, telling me he misses me when he has a new gf and in fact got with her 6 wks after we split. Although apparent she is a rebound, they are still together which is great for them but not for me when he has continued to speak to me on and off every week for 6 months. Whether his gf had any clue is an absolute mystery to me but frankly I don’t care anymore.

I finally had enough and decided that No contact was best.

Its been 15 days and counting and I am waiting for the magical day 60 to arrive because as much as I love him he is no way good enough to be with me. I’ve been blogging and venting and I can feel the old me returning as its been a long time coming!

Slowly I can feel the control coming back to my life and I feel more sorry for her than me.:-)

Contact was always minimal between us since we broke up, my decision. He wanted to remain friends and I didn’t. If you read my other posts you will see the previous contact that was made. He always initiated the calls and text messages, even bought me a gift for my birthday.

Sometimes were easier that others and at least 80% of the time I didn’t give in to temptation and reply to him or call him. Sometimes I really want to call him but If I wait a bit the feeling passes.

However this last two weeks we have spoken to each other five times! If we talk and he talks about “us” I don’t reply, usually just change the subject. But it seems with each call we talk more intimate if I can put it like that. The last time we spoke he told me he misses me and he spoke about things he would of rather done when we were going through the last days of the relationship. He told me he thinks about me and how things would of been, if we had babies. He tells me he’s wanted to see me so much. That he doesn’t know how he can be with someone else after been with me. He says he is confused and that he doesn’t know what he’ll do if he see’s with someone else. This after he was seeing another girl a week after we broke up. He seems sincere and I can hear the remorse in his voice. He even wants to go and see a therapist to sort out his issues.

I don’t think he expected me to handle the break-up the way I have. Ir’s brought me closer to my family and trully made me a better person. I make myself Happy now. Sometimes when I talk to him he makes me feel guilty about moving on with my life.

I still love him very much and I miss him alot but I don’t think it’s enough to want to get back with him. I think the hardest thing is the someone to share stupid, silly things with. He was the closest I have ever been to another person. I bared my soul to him, he knew me like no one else and it’s hard letting go of that.

I know that it’s best to completely cut all contact just like Eddie says.On the instances that we have spoken I always have control over the situation. Sometimes I get mad at myself and think that if couldn’t choose me and our love he shouldn’t have the privilidge of talking to me.
Easier said than done though, my head tells me one thing and my heart tells me another.

I know he chose to not be with me and I did all that I could. I know I will get through this and be a stronger person on the other side.

My newest affirmation, “I’M STRONGER THAN THESE FEELINGS, I’M IN CONTROL”.

Have a fabulous weekend.

what i found that helps in wanting to just let it all out is writing out what you want to say or text to him. you’re letting out your feelings they just wont get to him. sometimes it just needs to get out.