Step by step, I learned to function again, to find myself again. The more I concentrated on myself and not on the outside, the more I learned who I really was.
I found out many things about myself back then, things I didn’t know before: what kind of a person I was and why I’d become like that. For a few months, I focused very intently upon this task: to learn who I really was.
I worked with counselors, (a very good friend who is a psychotherapist helped me tremendously to reach my personal goals), and educated myself in different categories of self-improvement.
It was all about self-improvement. Find out who you are and become a better person.
I learned more in 2 months about myself and how to improve my circumstances than in my entire life until then. And you know what happened? As I got to know myself, I started to like myself for the first time in my adult life.
After that came a period where I wanted to give back what I had learned. I decided to help others, because I truly believed, (and still do believe), that this is one major secret to overcoming a break up.
I joined a breakup helpline, run by a nonprofit-making organization. I had to take a counseling course for a few months first before they would let me take calls from real people.
The experience was overwhelming.
I learned so much about breakup recovery and what people are mostly suffering from. I learned what helped them and what didn’t.
I learned that I wasn’t alone, that nearly every caller had the exact same problem that I had been suffering from.
Additionally, I did surveys with family, friends and other people on how they overcame their break ups.
I really was determined to find an applicable method to shorten the recovery time of a break up, and at the same time to improve themselves as a person.
My next personal hurdle was something I was terribly afraid of: to face my Ex again.
I maintained No-Contact for almost 2 years and really didn’t know what to expect.
The result after I saw her again for the first time was very surprising: I was completely indifferent about my feelings toward her and it felt like I was meeting an old friend.
That was the proof for me that I was over her.
I finally did it.
What happened after that?
Well, my life took a very fortunate turn after that. I had been able to resolve most of my issues, became stronger and confident, and understood the main pillars of a fulfilling relationship.
Like a phoenix I rose from the ashes and became a new person, a better me.
I’ve learned even more about effective break up recovery, and together with my friend the psychoanalyst, I developed a 7-step coaching program which has helped many people to get over their break ups in a record time.
So, what would you say – am I real?
Man, you won’t believe how real I am.
Your friend and coach,
Eddie Corbano
Eddie Corbano is a breakup-coach, relationship-advisor and founder of LovesAGame. He suffered from a devastating break up in 1998. Since then, he dedicated his life to helping others getting the best of this existential experience. The overcoming of a break up is an important step to autonomy and independency. Eddie Corbano developed some new coaching programs, which focus on evolving inner strength and the power to set and reach any personal goal. (Article written on March 16th, 2009)
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