I would like to share with you what I've learned the last two weeks when I was tied to a hospital bed in agonizing pain.
I suffered for over 48 hours, from pain that was so overwhelming that all other reality was blurred out – until an emergency operation finally saved me from madness.
Pain so intense like that is absolute. It's all there is. Another reality, another existence. You are all physical. Nothing left of your spiritual part, so it seems.
In fact, I tried all of the meditation techniques I knew, (and I am quite experienced with this), to get rid of the pain, but nothing worked.
So finally I gave up and surrendered to it.
Know what I'm talking about?
All there is, is pain
You know in moments like that, all you want is this pain to stop – you would do anything, take any medication. And behind all that, like a lurking giant, is this fear, the defeating fear that the pain will never end, that it will go on forever.
Would this be the case, I would have to kill myself, so I thought. Luckily, this was out of the question, (as it should always be), because the operation set things back to normal.
But what I experienced over those excruciating 48 hours, (besides that even the toughest narcotics had no impact on me), was something very interesting:
I observed that there are actually two different persons in me.
No, I'm not going nuts, and I've not developed a split personality.
The power within us
I actually observed that there was this one person that winded in pain like a worm, moaning over his terrible fate, and yet another one, a much stronger one. A personality, who doesn't seem to be impacted by the whole thing: An almighty observer inside of me.
I know, I know, this really sounds crazy.
But it actually approves what I have read in many books: That there is a higher version of yourself inside of you.
A higher version of ourselves with the power of self-healing.
This was not the first time that I noticed the presence of this part of me, (and it WAS a part of ME). At times through a stroke of fate, when life really hit me hard – there it was, watching, observing, not judging, as it was sucking up life in all its facets.
I leave it to you how to call this part of you if you WANT to give it a name, (and I know every one of us has it inside of themselves, and its own definition if aware of it).
I am certain that this part of me could have healed me completely in a second if only I had known how to make use of it.
I'm sure that there are people in the world who know how to do this. The internet is full of stories of spontaneous healings, and only heaven knows how much of them happen every day without anybody knowing about it.
All I know for now is that it's there.
What I've learned
What I've learned in this two weeks is that no pain lasts forever, be it physical or emotional pain and that we have the power in our own hands to heal ourselves, (of course, I knew all of this before, but an experience like this brings it more close to you).
To self-heal emotional pain that is torturing us, for example after a breakup or a loss, seems much easier and there are many ways to approach this, (just take a look around this site).
To self-heal physical pain and diseases just by altering your state of mind seems to be A LOT more complex and is something humanity has yet to learn.
But, in what I absolutely believe in, is that we alone create our reality. And thereby will our inner emotional conflicts manifest themselves as illnesses. A logical conclusion here is that by solving these emotional conflicts, you can heal the illness.
All you would have to do is to get to the emotional core of this illness, resolve it and it will vanish.
There are really many books on this topic, which give a greater insight.
The book that comes to my mind first is, You Can Heal Your Life, by Louise Hay, which is really a great book. Louise Hay healed herself from cancer by realizing her deepest emotional pain, her hatred against her father.
So, if you happen to be in emotional or physical pain, look out for that “almighty observer” in you – he might help you.
SSomedaywe all WILL realize that to heal ourselves we do not have to go to a doctor, the power is already within us.
Of course, this is easier said than done, especially when the doctors cured you recently from killing pain.
If you have had similar thoughts or experiences or book recommendations on this matter, please feel free to share them in the comments section. Thanks.
(Photograph is a courtesy of Ali K.)