hi jen,

i understand your feelings but you should talk to him straightway that what does he want . You should ask him that which type of relationship he is expecting from you because it is going to be much easier for you in future if you guys have set up everything before because one side dedication doesn’t work for so long so it’s better to face the truth rather knowing the truth but trying to deny it.

hope you will think practically about this

I have a question for those that have a long term relationships. Sometimes when you are talking to each other it makes me wonder what others say to each other or how they always have something to talk about. To make a long story short I have been in a long distance relationship for about six months now and at the beginning we have been talking a lot basically sharing and learning about things from each other to the point where I basically learned everything about his life and he knows about mine. And now it has seem that when we talk there is less and less to talk about because we pretty much know what each other’s day is like. I understand that it isn’t necessarily to always have something to say to each other and that just the prescence of the person is enough at time but it makes it hard since I’m afraid that we might slowly drift apart. Another thing is that I have met this person online and with the way my schedule is and my family situations I can not see this person for about another year or maybe until August of next year.

Eddie…

Great article!! It’s always good to know that there are people like you who stay positive and provide positive feedback regarding long distance relationships! Everything you outlined in your article is true, LDR are not impossible, it’s about being strong and believing in what you have. You gave practical, doable and legitimate advice!

Hi to everyone who reads this.

I need a little help. My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship and we just had our first MAJOR argument last night. Sure, we’ve had discussion where we dont see eye to eye, but it seems those differences bring us closer. Not this time. I felt disrespected because of a video he favourited on YouTube. It was a bunch of barely legal girls dancing like… Well, it was very inappropriate and they barely had clothes. Thats saying a lot coming from me, since Im 18.

Well, I brought it up with him and he kind of flipped. I explained to him how I felt. That by favouriting that, or even watching it, he was somewhat lusting for those girls. Did he want me to dress like that or did he wish I looked like that? I dont know.

I told him all of my thoughts, how I felt disrespected, and how it really bothered me and he wasnt being empathetic at all. Nor sympathetic. In the end, I was the one that ended up apologizing so it wouldn’t lead to a break up. He says I threw everything out of proportion and I never said anything before when he was watching “other” videos *hint, hint* via the internet.

Was I wrong and did I throw everything out of proportion?

I just need some advice and anyones thoughts on this, please. And thanks to all who may help.

Big thanks to Eddie! This site had been an amazing help and guide for me. Its never let me down before.

@-XchelsX-

Hey i just got out of a long distance relationship. and well all i can really tell u is that Boys will be boys and watch that kind of stuff you know, but they will hit the age when they will soon realize to grow up and stop u know? but be carful with the guy haha.. might end up breakin ur heart

Great article.
My boyfriend actually found this a few months ago..
I wish he found this 3 years ago… would have saved soo much pain.

Me and my LD have been on and off for 3 years. This time around we’ve stayed together for 5 mouths as of the 8th. We are extremely happy right now, he’ll be coming to see me for the first time in 8 months. I met him on chatpit..
Many people dont think this can work.. bc there is no or very little physical contact. Personally, being bi polar. Long distance relationships are alot easier for me because of that. You get to know the actually person inside.. and then when you get your chance.. you can get to know them on the outside.. you know what i mean ?

I think you should like.. post this on like myspace and facebook, make it known that LDR’s can work.

I’ve been in a LDR for 2 and a half years, 5 months of that time moved to his state and lived with him. I missed my family and decided to go back home. We ended but 3 wks after I left we are now back on and in 3 months he’s coming back to my home state where we met to stay for good. We met while we were working together, he was attending school, graduated and had no choice to move back home. Its a struggle but our love keeps us going. You have to be strong and have a lot of trust to be in this kind of relationship. Its not easy, but what is.

@-XchelsX- -

hey well i think i would have done the same thing to be completely honest like idk i get a lil jealous when i think he is talk in to other girls i have had that happen to me b4 with my ex huband..well me and my bf have been together for like a month now and we r like head over heels for each other but we havent told it bluntly lol but one day i had his phone and there was a pic of a blonde girl well a message had poped up and it said well i seen u on sat with that girl u was all over that B..ch i was like omg what the world u know well i asked him about it and him being hispanic he said it was his friends u know he had to txt the girl bc his friend couldnt spell enlish i was so upset i called a guy friend had him come pick me up and everything i was crying abd well come to find out he as tell the truth but the lesson i learned is a guy is a guy if he is looking then maybe its just to see what he truly has i mean my bf will look at a girl and then look at me and say im the best he will ever meet well i hope i helped u out what im trying t o say is …….when u see a cute guy not u at least glance??? see dont get mad at every little thing it will ruin ur relationship bad!!

hey i just got intomy second long distant relationship with a woman that i really care about but lately see been pushing me to the side for no reason and i dont what to really do because my last LDR wasnt like this i dont want to cut her off because shes a beautiful woman and i dont want to hurt her in no kind of way i would really appreciate it thanks

im 18 and im in my first long distance my freinds tell me to let her go but im so into her more than any girl at my school. she lives in ohio i live in florida, we were holding on real nice for about a year and half i couldnt get her off my mind kinda lowered in my studies lol but anyhow now its kinda hard since were both seniors at our schools and were about to start our lives but all this seems so complicated now i planned on bringing her down here over the summer but she thinks that me putting cash for her is like for nothing i told her we can go to the same college but her parents are over protective shes stubborn like iam unfortunately and i told her maybe i should head over there to meet her rents she doesnt mind but shes worried what they might say and well she just wants to get out of there. right now im so complicated in this idk what to do i love her and she loves me but it feels like were on our last hold. =/ i want to get her down here to study with me in university of miami but her parents are holding her back what do i do? someone please respond to my SOS appreciate it

Hi I’m having trouble with my long distances relationship with my bf he’s can be so sweet at times but then he turns around ad gets all mad for no reason and says he doesn’t think I love him he’s so negitive sometimes and idk what to say to him when he’s like that he says I don’t show him enough love but I’m kinda scared to show it cause I might mess up what should I do????

this is a really good article, has great advice. but what about long distance relationships where you can’t communicate with your bf on a regular basis? where you have no idea when you can see him, and it seems as if he doesn’t want you to post him a letter? i was with my bf for 7 months before he moved to another state for the army, so he’s in training at the moment. the next time i’ll be able to see him is april, and after that, i have no idea. he’ll be in the army for at least 4 years. he hardly ever gets to use a phone, doesn’t use the internet down there apparently, and he won’t tell me how to address a letter to him. (even though i already found out, and have been telling him all i need to know from him is his platoon and company, but he hasn’t told me). so how the hell is this going to work? right now it doesn’t even feel like i’m in a relationship.

im currently in a long distance relationship with a girl i would consider ‘the one’, but right now we have kind of hit a rough patch as she wants an open relationship, but i dont think i could do that, she says there will be no sex she just wants to be kissed when she gets the chance. we are both still young, 20, but all i want is to be with her. im scared if i say no she will leave me but im also scared that i wont be able to trust her if i say yes. does anyone have any advice that might help?

uhh i really dont know how some people can do it..
its really hard work i bearly ended my LDR and i thought
wow he gave the stupidest excuse that i wasnt talktive but
i guess he just found anouther girl…
its really hard talking about something with him cuz we dnt tend
too have something to talk about.
but he would always blame me i got to see him alot at first
and then it just stop cuz he never had time…
i was actully really sad that we broke up cuz we been going out for 10 mouths really close too a year but now i just got all better
this really wasnt working out and we just decied to be really cool friends for now i guess, he said well see when we get much older what happens…but in my side of thinking it doesnt work and its not the same without your love one everyday…so i actully think that its great who can actully do a ldr.(:

Dont apoliqize if you feel you were right if he does not understand your feelings it will not work out in the long run

How do you know he was telling the truth about that pic? So what if he is hispanic..

thanks! mr. Corbano.. i appreciate it a lot.. it makes us much stronger coz your right.. keep it up! im expecting more advices and tips bout long distance relationship!=))

next tuesday, iwould be with my girlfriend for a year. its been a whole year since i’ve seen her. se was suppose to come see me but something bad happened. everytime she tries to come see me, something bad happens. i broke up with her and now we’re taking a break. we’re still talking and stuff. but i realy love her but im so hurt because she broke a promise she made to me.we’re only 6 hours apart. yes im 16 and shes 17 so its kinda hard. what should i do abut us?

Everything has reason for long distance relationship. For me, My girlfriend far away to each other because I should earn money for me and my girlfriend future.. 1. Communication, 2. Trust, 3 Faithful, 4 loyal, 5 Love, 6. send a gift sometimes or romatantic love letter. 7. Dont lose hope and just believe to each other 8. Be strong… your physical is not there but your heart always with her. Be strong and love to each other..Happy Valentine day..

@Kelsey – Valentine… I don’t want to sound negative but being a female that served in the army, he is either special forces and can’t tell you anything or he’s MARRIED. simple as that. But note special forces/ops still can receive mail and make calls from time to time. Good luck

my bf just broke up with me 2 days before vday,and he lives on the other side of the coast. i love him with all my heart and i want him back really bad. what should i do?

This is truly a great article. I’ve been in an long-distance relationship for the past 4 months and yet I knew once I started talking to him that he was special, different. After less than a week I told him I was starting to fall for him and he said “Oh thank God, I thought it was just me.” We haven’t been able to meet yet because neither of us have the money and I’m a senior in high school but my mom is flying him here over the summer and then probably later this year I’m flying there. He lives in California and I live in Ohio. He bought me a card for Valentine’s Day and I sent him one. Most of the stuff mentioned here are things we already do. Except going certain days not talking to each other As a teenage girl I go through a lot of drama and he can calm me down like no one else can lol. We talk from 6:40a.m. (my time) to about 1a.m. on school nights. Then from about 11a.m. to 4a.m. on weekends. We’re either texting or on yahoo. We talk on the phone every couple of days and leave each other voicemails every day that we don’t. We trust each other completely and we never lie. I didn’t really trust guys before him but after hearing his voice over the phone for the first time I knew he was sincere. I’m young and in love

ok me and this guy have been talking for a while and were dating I live in louisiana and hes in the navy in cali, he’s coming to see me and everything b4 deployment cuz he cant get time off now. But for some reason some days i can’t wait to talk to him and some days i dont want to, i feel like i love him and i know he loves me. But I know this sounds bad on my part but most of my friends are guys so im always listening to them saying how they think hes lucky to have me and how they wished they could be with me and its making me wonder about everything cuz i could have someone here that i could see whenever i wanted versus have someone MILES away from me. I dont want to break up with him or anything but on the other hand im more scared of getting hurt cuz im so used to it and that i dont want to do this. any advise??

I’m in a gay long distance relationship and I think your post makes lots of sense.

I can relate to many of the things you describe.

It’s helped me and I’m sure many others.

Thanks for taking the time to write the article.

My relationship has been off n on for 4 yrs now. Come to think of it, it’s doing pretty well. We’ve been apart from state to states.
But we get to meet on holidays in our hometown.

Now the problem is, she’s leaving the country soon. For 6 years.
I never want to talk abt it to her, because this is what she wants to do.
Medical , in russia. She’ll be leaving in a few months.
We just celebrated our 1st valentine’s day together this year, because all these years before we didn’t had the chance to.
My heart aches to think that she’d need someone ovr there, and it stings to think that she’l fall for a new person who take cares of her there for all those year. i can’t go ovr because i need to finish of my degree here, Aus.
And long distance communication won’t do much, because i believe every person needs comfort. And comfort comes in 2 forms. emotiontly & physcly
I can’t provide physically, and its a sure thing that’d she’l go look for it.
I need Help.

It is lucky that my parents had accepted my sexuality since I officially came out at the age of 19. I am 29 years old now.

I had ended my 10 year relationship with another man last year. It should have ended on the 5th year but we tried to fix it. It survived another 5 years but those extra 5 years are becoming more and more difficult for both of us. and so, the relationship ended.

After it ended, I had short term relationships.. This has been I guess my way to tell myself that I am “still” young and I will be just fine without him (the man I lived with for the last 10 years). But since these were all “rushed” It did not work as well. I will be honest that my sexual level was high and I had those new relationship to satisfy the need.

Until one day October 19, 2009. I was seen by a guy whom I just added in one of those Social Network sites. He was just there in my profile page but we never get a chance to communicate. The next day, I received a letter from him saying “I saw you walking in front of Gateway Mall…just want to say hello”. I replied to him “You could have greeted me then please reach me at (my mobile number)”. And that afternoon, I received a text message from him.

And so we met in my house. lets call him by the name “Merck”. Of course since this guy waited for 2 years just for me know that he exists, he was so exited about it (both emotionally and sexually). One the very first time we met, something happened. But according to him he did not do it for lust. He did it to let me know that his waiting has come to an end. He asked if I am still seeing another person and he will understand..he just wants honesty. I told him of course I am free.

I do not know if destiny is really playful because when he visited my house for the first time, he received a call from the Employment Agency that his application to The Middle East is approved and he can now start working with his requirements. He is a Registered nurse. I told myself secretly “did he come just to say goodbye?”. I pretended happy but of course I was sad..I hate all forms of goodbyes. But I cannot hinder this person of his dream.

We dated and courted each other for the next 2 weeks until we official on October 30, 2009. He revealed to me everything. From his childhood, his favorites, family. The challenge that I had with him was he gets jealous..not in an unhealthy way. Its because he does not want to lose me anymore. It was nice and I assured him that “he will be the one”. He knows that I am prone to temptation and since he is a Christian, he had asked me to throw all my porn related materials. According to him, if I believe and I truly love him, I will do it because this act is for me anyways. I did that.

We enjoyed each other. He sees to it that we meet everyday, we go to church together, spend time quietly. We made plans and schemes and we do our best to survive. We were able to enjoy our “Monthsary”, Christmas and New Year. On January 1, 2010..He bought a pair of ring. Though we know that same sex marriage is not yet recognized in the Philippines, a simple moment of vows is good enough.

I love this guy. So in love with him that I forgot that time flies. February 17, 2010, we talked and he said that he will leave for Middle East on March 1, 2010.

I know that he will have to fly one of these days. I had accepted that situation. But I cant help but to cry and be sad. I have been reading books regarding LDR but how come I feel restless and fearful?

He assured me that he will be on vacation every 6 months and he is going to do this for our dream. He even looks forward that he will find me a job there related to my work My mom is very supportive with me and him and encourages us. He even told my mom that “I am HIS forever”.

Any advise on how I can survive this sadness?

also I wanted to knopw
why i fear so much
of not seeing him for a couple of months
could it be im seeing my reflection of my bad past that is why I do not see my partner being loyal to me? 9:29
am I depressed?

well i think it depends on how you confronted him about the issue
im am in a long distance relationship myself i have been with my girlfriend for nearly three years and have been separated for the last 5 months its hard i know. i am 1 myself and i know that when my girlfriend confronts me about something like that i tend to get my back up very quickly when being accused of something even if i am in the wrong. if he is anything like me the typical guy he would not have ment any disrespect to you by watching the video and would not have been doing so ‘because your not good enough’ the fact is that every guy checks out every hot girl weather they will admit it or not.
as long as they don’t act on it it should not be a problem however i do not think that it was apropriate for him to advertise the fact on a website that he was checking out other guys if he was any kind of smart he would have kept it secret to himself so to not hurt your feeling hope i have helped you understand guys a little AND GUYS OUT THERE HERE IS A LESSON FOR YOU THIS KIND OF THING DOES UPSET THE LADIES SO DON’T DO IT OR DON’T SHOW THEM THAT YOU DO IT

REGARDS
KRIS

mate by the sounds of you saying that she would go looking for it(sex) i presume ur talking about you don’t have to much faith in her as it is all i know is that and im not trying to disapoint you but girls are all sluts man they will never wait that long i mean look how many women cheat on there husband that are say even truck drivers for example they may only be gone for a week at a time and its still not good enough for the women imagine six years apart they would forget who there hubby was

also two people change alot in six years mate your only option is to follow her or for her to sacrifice for you i guess it depends how much she means to you and vice versa if she is the one a degree doesn’t matter bro you can finish study anytime in your life its never to late but thats just what i think

I have been in a LDR with a man for going on two years. It was from the first scenario- met online and realized we were 2000 miles apart.

I agree with all of your tips, except for the “meet once a month”. Sounds wonderful, and in an ideal situation it would be, but not many people can afford a date that costs several hundred dollars every month! (Especially in this economy, and it often includes time off from work, as well.)

That was a luxury we indulged in just a few times before we decided the money was better off saved for a permanent relocation. We are in the beginning of that process now.

are you saying that it’s more realistic to break up then going through LDR?

Hello my name is Lemar. My mom has gotten another job offer in San Antonio, Texas. I don’t want to leave my girl becasue iknow deep inside she will be hurt.

hi~
thanks for the tips of long distance relationship.
i think long distance relationship is work somehow!!!
my sister had been in an relationship with her boyfriend in three years since she was in high school.
then his boyfriend went to England to continue his degree. At that time period, my sister and him just keep sending e-mail to each other and not talk very often. Three years later, my sister’s boyfriend came back. They started to dating again for two years. They got married in last July 2009. They had been dating for eight years.

I am in an relationship. It is a long distance relationship too.
We had been dating for a month before we separated. As what you say, I will went down to his place for each month. It is six hours drive to him. But after summer, he is moving to Hawaii to study there and i will still in US. We will not meet each other in three years. We both from Hong Kong, so after we graduate, we will both go back to Hong Kong. It is hard for me to keep close with him, because he do not like to talk on phone. he likes to chat with me on msn. We had lots of fun while we are chatting. Sometimes it just hard for me to stop thinking about our relationship. Because I moved up to North and all my friends and him still in the same states. It is hard to stand without your friends and your boyfriends.
I hope that we can be secess on our relationship.