10 Rules To Make Long Distance Relationships Work
by Eddie Corbano6. Send A Written Letter Once In A While
Do not underestimate the marvelous feeling, when you look in your letter box and find a letter from your love, open it and see his/her writing. This is a pleasure we often forget about in this modern times. Not to mention that it’s far more romantic.
7. Beware Of Jealousy
Jealousy is a very dangerous thing and can threaten every long distance relationship. Jealousy is commonly a lack of trust and understanding. It very often reveals insecurities and bad experiences in other relationships.
The keyword here is simply: trust. You cannot control and observe your partner, you only can have faith in your relationship and in the things you build together in the times you had. Hold on to that and never give in to that green eyed monster.
Jealousy is one of the most negative and destructive emotions there is! Listen to Shakespeare:
O, beware, my lord, of jealousy
It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock
The meat it feeds on; that cuckold lives in bliss
Who, certain of his fate, loves not his wronger
But, O, what damned minutes tells he o’er
Who dotes, yet doubts, suspects, yet strongly loves!
8. Avoid Dangerous “Situations”
As mentioned before, trust is essential. If you completely trust your partner and also have faith in your relationship, you can pretty much do what you want without endangering your relation. However, I nevertheless recommend avoiding some specific situations. Of course it depends on the person, but I would not date the opposite sex alone, or go to wild parties. Simply avoid temptations that could distract you from each other.
Better safe than sorry!
9. Never Loose Faith
“People will tell you that long distance relationships never work. Don’t listen!”
Watch out, you will meet a lot of skepticism. People will tell you that long distance relationships never work, especially those who have had negative experiences about it. Don’t listen to them. People tend to negate things they failed on.
Listen to me: it can definitely work, but you both have to believe it. Check out my article on achieving goals.
10. Always Stay Positive
Always assume that your partner loves you and cares about you. Never assume anything negative, whether you read something in his/her e-mails or you disliked how he/she made a weird comment on something. Don’t interpret to much in it.
The problem with non-face-to-face communication is the lack of facial expression. It is so easy to misinterpret but unfortunately much harder to trust and stay positive.
I assure you, if something was wrong, you will know it.
As you can see, I’m definitely positive about long distance relationships. They expose ongoing life lessons, and prove that love, loyalty, and faith are the vital ingredients to a lasting relationship.
Have faith, have trust and you both will succeed in the end.
Your friend,
Eddie Corbano
My Recommendation For Further Reading:
- The Long-Distance Relationship Survival Guide - Secrets From Successful Couples Who Have Gone The Distance
- Long Distance Relationships: The Complete Guide - Proven Strategies For Building And Maintaining A Successful LDR
5 Must-See Related Posts:
About The Author:
Eddie Corbano is a breakup-coach, relationship-advisor and founder of LovesAGame. He suffered from a devastating break up in 1998. Since then, he dedicated his life to helping others getting the best of this existential experience. The overcoming of a break up is an important step to autonomy and independency. Eddie Corbano developed some new coaching programs, which focus on evolving inner strength and the power to set and reach any personal goal. (Article written on March 21st, 2007)
Show all posts by Eddie Corbano
271 Responses to “10 Rules To Make Long Distance Relationships Work”
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Recent Comments:
Wow, this sounds like exactly what happened between me and my boyfriend. I hate to admit it to you, but hes falling for this other girl and he is way...
GIRLS view... | November 5, 2009 | more»
My girlfriend and I split in April after four years. We lived together and the first month after she told me she wanted to split was spent with me staying with...
Paul | November 5, 2009 | more»
@jvrie - I am so sorry to hear that,I know EXACLTY how you feel dont worry girlie you’re gonna be okay just give it time at night instaed of...
Adriana | November 5, 2009 | more»
I am trying the no contact rule but it is so hard, at first i would give in and tell him to not be a stranger. But than i would change my mind and tell him...
Gloria | November 5, 2009 | more»
My boyfriend of five months broke up with me 2 weeks today. We started fighting the week before we broke up and I noticed he was acting really weird. Instead...
Taylor | November 5, 2009 | more»
hi jen,
i understand your feelings but you should talk to him straightway that what does he want . You should ask him that which type of relationship he is expecting from you because it is going to be much easier for you in future if you guys have set up everything before because one side dedication doesn’t work for so long so it’s better to face the truth rather knowing the truth but trying to deny it.
hope you will think practically about this
I have a question for those that have a long term relationships. Sometimes when you are talking to each other it makes me wonder what others say to each other or how they always have something to talk about. To make a long story short I have been in a long distance relationship for about six months now and at the beginning we have been talking a lot basically sharing and learning about things from each other to the point where I basically learned everything about his life and he knows about mine. And now it has seem that when we talk there is less and less to talk about because we pretty much know what each other’s day is like. I understand that it isn’t necessarily to always have something to say to each other and that just the prescence of the person is enough at time but it makes it hard since I’m afraid that we might slowly drift apart. Another thing is that I have met this person online and with the way my schedule is and my family situations I can not see this person for about another year or maybe until August of next year.
Eddie…
Great article!! It’s always good to know that there are people like you who stay positive and provide positive feedback regarding long distance relationships! Everything you outlined in your article is true, LDR are not impossible, it’s about being strong and believing in what you have. You gave practical, doable and legitimate advice!
Hi to everyone who reads this.
I need a little help. My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship and we just had our first MAJOR argument last night. Sure, we’ve had discussion where we dont see eye to eye, but it seems those differences bring us closer. Not this time. I felt disrespected because of a video he favourited on YouTube. It was a bunch of barely legal girls dancing like… Well, it was very inappropriate and they barely had clothes. Thats saying a lot coming from me, since Im 18.
Well, I brought it up with him and he kind of flipped. I explained to him how I felt. That by favouriting that, or even watching it, he was somewhat lusting for those girls. Did he want me to dress like that or did he wish I looked like that? I dont know.
I told him all of my thoughts, how I felt disrespected, and how it really bothered me and he wasnt being empathetic at all. Nor sympathetic. In the end, I was the one that ended up apologizing so it wouldn’t lead to a break up. He says I threw everything out of proportion and I never said anything before when he was watching “other” videos *hint, hint* via the internet.
Was I wrong and did I throw everything out of proportion?
I just need some advice and anyones thoughts on this, please. And thanks to all who may help.
Big thanks to Eddie! This site had been an amazing help and guide for me. Its never let me down before.
@-XchelsX-
Hey i just got out of a long distance relationship. and well all i can really tell u is that Boys will be boys and watch that kind of stuff you know, but they will hit the age when they will soon realize to grow up and stop u know? but be carful with the guy haha.. might end up breakin ur heart
Great article.
My boyfriend actually found this a few months ago..
I wish he found this 3 years ago… would have saved soo much pain.
Me and my LD have been on and off for 3 years. This time around we’ve stayed together for 5 mouths as of the 8th. We are extremely happy right now, he’ll be coming to see me for the first time in 8 months. I met him on chatpit..
Many people dont think this can work.. bc there is no or very little physical contact. Personally, being bi polar. Long distance relationships are alot easier for me because of that. You get to know the actually person inside.. and then when you get your chance.. you can get to know them on the outside.. you know what i mean ?
I think you should like.. post this on like myspace and facebook, make it known that LDR’s can work.
I’ve been in a LDR for 2 and a half years, 5 months of that time moved to his state and lived with him. I missed my family and decided to go back home. We ended but 3 wks after I left we are now back on and in 3 months he’s coming back to my home state where we met to stay for good. We met while we were working together, he was attending school, graduated and had no choice to move back home. Its a struggle but our love keeps us going. You have to be strong and have a lot of trust to be in this kind of relationship. Its not easy, but what is.