When I first read this email from our dear reader Mike, I didn't know if I should laugh or cry.
The email was funny and very original, but I immediately sensed the excruciating pain that was behind it.
Someone who knew what he was talking about obviously wrote it.
I replied back if he would like to share his story and he did. I will post it below with his permission; I hope it will inspire you as it did me.
Here it is:
The Break-Up Diet Recipe
You want to lose weight? This diet guarantees to suppress your appetite.
- 1ea. Heaping serving of broken heart crushed into many small pieces.
- 1ea. Severe emotional pain sprinkled with “this is all my fault” never ending thoughts.
- 1ea. Anxiety from hell – this will likely come with the above-mentioned ingredients and will cause a sleep disorder
Blend well and mix with “I will never love again” with just a dash of “my ex has moved on and I can't.”
You will consume this diet every second of the day until the seconds are minutes, hours, days, and finally months. Extreme cases require that the diet continues into years, but it’s not recommended. After you have had enough of this diet you are encouraged to discontinue because it’s “NOT WORTH IT!”
This diet is not easy to stop, but history has shown multitudes of people have stopped and led a happy life and you can too.
Mike's Story
That was ten months ago, and all the pain, hurt, and sadness cannot be put into words even though I’ve tried many times to explain to anyone who would listen what it was like to live this hell I was going through.
I was so hopeful that maybe someone, anyone, would have some magic words that would help me to at least be able to breathe. My life, my world was over and nothing would/could repair it. She was out of my life and had made it clear that she didn’t want anything else to do with me.
I then started what many people have experienced due to a breakup – unintentional self-destruction.
I was so absorbed by the pain that nothing in my life mattered. Sleep was the only thing I looked forward to when it would come because that was the only time the hurt subsided. But as soon as I awaken it was back to the hell I was so dreading.
I wanted her back so badly I was willing to do anything, but she had made it so very clear on that October day – it was over.
I began throwing out anything that would remotely remind me of her in hopes of just getting through the next minute and then maybe… just maybe the next hour. I felt I was alone on an island and no one knew what I was going through. It just seemed so hopeless.
My appetite suffered and the only thing I could eat was cereal and then only at night (Thus the breakup diet).
I, of course, began to lose weight and eventually decided that maybe something positive may come out of all of this suffering. So I just embraced the appetite loss and began to exercise more and started eating right.
I went from 207 down to 157 and have maintained that give or take a couple of pounds.
The one thing that I have done, that has helped more than any book, article, conversations, counseling, and yes even prayer is No-Contact. I realize how hard that is to do and don’t beat yourself up if you have failed at it but that along with the passing of time is so much help.
A couple of weeks ago a co-worker ran into my ex whom I haven’t seen nor talked to in 10 months, and her statement to him was “I miss him (me) every minute of every day.”
Now imagine what that did to me – I didn’t know how to process that information. Hearing that she misses me as much as I do her, of course, made me want to contact her.
But I did some inventory of the past ten months of suffering and decided it wasn’t worth the chance of going even one step back that contact would cause. Yes, I still love and miss her in every way and every day but I have come so far that I don’t want to look back.
I hope in some way these words will help someone that has a broken heart to know it WILL get better.
Mike
I remember to have experienced a similar weight-loss back then:
From 150 to 134 pounds, which was really not so good considering my height (6 feet). It took me some time to regain my normal weight.
What about you? Have you lost or gained weight during your break-up? Please share below.
Your friend,
Eddie Corbano
Hi. I’m 21 and just split from my boyfriend of 9 months (doesn’t seem like a long time but I spent every day with him). We split because he says he needs some head space as he is only 19. But deep down I know its because he wants more freedom on weekends with his friends (I never once stopped him from going out with his friends). We split a week ago. In that week, I have lost half a stone due to feeling physically sick at the thought of any food. I know this isn’t good for me but does anyone have any suggestions as I am an active person and train in the gym 3/4 times a week.
Thanks
I too have lost weight but feel like im losing my mind also i dont no what to do. I have bad headache and stomach pain. I was with my man for 14 years and wasnt married and didnt see our relationship going any where so i called it quit.. he was mad and said i will be back.. i do want to go back but i want him to change.and miss me and treat me better it been 19 days and ive found a place and still haven’t heard from him i wont call just to prove him wrong but if i go back i no things will stay the same if i move on i might find happiness one day.. please help confused lost and and wondering did i make the right decision.
You did make the right decision. If he really misses you and wanted to be with you, he would contact you and do whatever it takes to be together. He might change his mind, but in the mean time, take care of you. I was recently Dumped by the man I thought was “the one”. I’m not sure when I’ll feel better, but I know what I want out of my next relationship. Maybe my guy will change his mind, but I hac a feeling it’ll be too late.
I lost a lot of weight after my breakup of a 5 year relationship that drained me emotionally and I didn’t want to be in it. It was really difficult still, and i found myself being extremely depressed with no apetite. The only thing that helped was just sitting there doing nothing. I went to therapy eventually which seemed to help, and no contact was difficult.
I was 145 (5’3) and went down to 115, i’m now a healthy 123 pounds, i’m not over weight anymore which i’m happy about. I never thought i’d be able to regain my life but I look better and I’m doing so many things …
Same boat, but not regrettably so….
Ive gone from about 210 to 177, and I am embracing it.
I was the one who broke it off after about a year, and was actually at peace with my decision. But SHE wanted to stay friends. Every time I saw her feelings flooded back. I couldn’t eat, had really bad indigestion. Started working out just to get my mind in the right place which served as a catalyst for my weight loss.
Then, get this, she starts seeing someone else and is telling me all this explicit stuff about her current relationship. I couldn’t do the “friend” thing anymore. I broke off the relationship because we weren’t going anywhere as a couple, only to find myself with a bunch of irrational and ill-placed feelings.
The strides Ive made in the past three days without any contact from her are invaluable. Its not even worth opening that can of worms again.
We loved eachother and it was beyond perfect , but then I don’t know what happened , it’s like we don’t know eachother anymore , so much distance between us for reasons I cannot find !! He stopped calling , texting just out of the blue , we’ve had our share of fights but I thought we resolved them clearly not everything is resolved .. Sometimes I feel he never really loved me or that he’s definitely over me now .. I honestly think over thinking burns the calories and fat :/