“The purpose of life is to live a life of purpose”
—Richard Leider
A very close relative once told me that one should learn from the mistakes others make, rather than from your own.
It took me a long time to discover that this was not true.
As a child, you learned the hard way that putting your hand on a hot stovetop is not a good idea.
If you had not made this particular mistake, wouldn't you have wondered what that might feel like your whole life?
On the other hand, it doesn't seem to be a good idea to jump in front of a driving truck only to experience that this was not such a good idea.
I think that there are certain mistakes you have to make by yourself.
Only then will you be able to catch a glimpse of the true nature of that particular situation along with its consequences, and you will be able to learn from it.
If you take this thought a little further, doesn't this mean that one should make as many mistakes as they can to learn as much they can?
Albert Einstein said:
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.Therefore, life is about experiencing the new, about making mistakes and about learning from them.
There are many road signs on the way which are trying to help us make the right decisions.
We are bombarded with rules of guidance.
There is religion, family, the government, society, the media – EVERYONE is teaching us about moral and ethics and how you should live your life.
The “modern urban” society has imposed unwritten rules upon us which, very often, betray us by the life we, as free human beings, should be living.
I believe that we should break the chains of society more often and leave one's comfort zone to find the “unknown.”
I believe that we should break the chains of society more often and leave one's comfort zone to find the “unknown.”
It is there, where the “magic” happens.
When we don't have the comfort of the known around us, feeling so secure, then something very uncomfortable happens, we are confronted with this thing we all know so well:
Fear.
But by facing what we fear, we learn invaluable life lessons from which we will benefit our whole lives.
Right after my experience, I learned more about myself and life in particular than I had in all the time before that.
The unknown and pain will make you wiser.
The following seven life rules I learned the hard way. Like putting your hand on a hot stove.
These are born out of mistakes, pain, tears, and fear.
I list them here not because I wanted to tell you how you should live your life, but because I want to show you a new perspective.
Maybe some of these life lessons may appeal to you, and you are willing to think about them. Maybe they don't make sense to you, and you will still have to make these mistakes for yourself.
Either way, they show you how good things can be born out of pain.
So here they are, my personal seven life rules:
1. Make decisions and never look back
Do you struggle to make important decisions? Do you often change your mind about something?
Not being able to make crucial decisions, and questioning them afterward, is a sign of low self-esteem and it always leads to fear and doubt.
This can eat a person up.
I try to make decisions quickly and to believe in them. If they turn out to be wrong, I learn and move on.
Whatever you do, always act, analyze and adapt.
2. Avoid procrastination
Postponing leads to fear, fear to depression.
You will feel paralyzed and be unable to make any decisions.
You become passive and are a victim of anything negative that happens in your life.
Action and taking control is the ONLY way out of this vicious cycle.
3. Be grateful for the good things in your life every single day
Appreciation and thankfulness are the two greatest traits one can have. They will ALWAYS bring in positive results.
This is something I never thought would be true.
Look around; there are so many things that you can be thankful for.
Even if your situation seems hopeless at the moment, there is always something beautiful to appreciate.
Out of this thankfulness and appreciation often comes something wonderful, unexpected.
I've witnessed this so many times.
4. Find your inner voice and always act by it
This is a tough one.
YOUR inner voice is something that is pure, unspoiled by society and your ego. Therefore it will always tell you the truth and the best solution for a situation.
The catch is that it's not so easy to filter out your inner voice because it's surrounded by fear and insecurity.
But it can be learned through mental-control and meditation.
I cannot tell how many mistakes I've made because I didn't listen to my inner voice telling me NO!
5. Never judge and never validate things, events or people
This life rule is a revelation and will get a HUGE weight off your shoulders if you try this (please read my comment on this rule in the comment section below).
Promise.
6. Always be flexible, say YES more often
There is a movie with Jim Carrey called “Yes Man” where, because of commitment, he always has to say “Yes!” to everything for an entire year.
During this time, his life turned out in crazy and surprisingly positive ways.
Of course, this is just a movie, but the fact is that I left out many positive opportunities in my life because of fear. I often said NO instead of YES.
Inflexibility is stopping life from flowing. Being flexible means grabbing opportunities, and opportunities are a way to grow.
Say “YES!” more often.
7. Always have goals, without goals you are a manless ship heading nowhere
It is of great significance to not only have a life goal but goals in every area of your life for the near future.
Goals have the benefit that they:
- determine the direction in which we want to go and focus on what WE want
- they focus our thinking and energy
- will distract us from negative experiences
- create a positive self-image and increases self-confidence
- make us take charge of our life
- allow that new possibilities will open up
- increase our motivation to carry out all necessary steps to achieve them
- give us measurable results
Goals give our lives direction and meaning.
“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
—Albert Einstein
Conclusion
I believe that it takes a rich life full of mistakes to realize what is crucial, and what brings us further as individuals.
Only then can you come up with a personal guiding system of life rules, which will lead you safely through the troubles and turmoils of life.
Have you found yours yet?
Which lessons have life taught YOU? I would love to know; please tell me all about it in the comment section below.
Your friend,
Eddie Corbano
Its sad when your ex goes back to their ex, I had that happen. Then he came back to me and begged and cried for me back, I should not have taken him back it was weak of me, but I believe in second chances I guess. But five months later and a few dumb fights we were done. So my suggestion for you is dont bother taking this girl back, I mean I wouldnt trade the good times I had with him but I gave away a part of who I really was to someone who really just used me so he was not alone. But like many have said each relationship in life is a learning experience and you have to take it for that. I learned that I should not settle for somone whom I knew I was much better than, even he knew it and told me a lot. So bottom line do not settle love yourself and wait for the right girl to come to you or maybe you will just find her.