Break Up and Divorce No Contact Help: How To Stay Strong And Not Text Your Ex

No Contact Help: How To Stay Strong And Not Text Your Ex

Maintaining No Contact with your Ex-Partner is probably the hardest thing you’ll ever do.

To make it easier, you try three things that will help you resist the temptation, stay strong, and just get through it.

No Contact Help - Let's survive the 60 days together
No Contact Help – Let's survive the 60 days together

Believe me, I know how horrible this is.

You wake up in the morning, and the pain rolls over you like a tsunami. All you want to do is text your Ex and make this all go away.

But you know that you can’t. It would only make things so much worse.

As a result, you are confused, frightened, and just don’t understand WHY all this is happening.

I know, I’ve been there.

But you are not helpless.

You can make it through and I will show you how.

Why You Are Struggling With No Contact

You have to accept that you are suffering from a form of addiction.

Still thinking of your Ex? Click here to learn WHY and what you can do about it.

Therefore, the concept of No Contact after a relationship breakup is very similar to alcohol or drug rehab:

Avoid the very thing that you are addicted to.

In other words, get your butt as far away from your Ex as you can.

You need time to heal and detox from your Ex.

I’m sure you are having a rough time with this. I certainly did. It's hard.

That's why before we continue, please make sure that you read my extensive guide about how to practically apply the rules to your situation:

No Contact Rule After a Breakup: The Definitive Guide

It’ll help.

“No Contact Is Killing Me.”

There are times when you miss your Ex so much that it hurts. Picking up the phone and texting or calling them would be so easy, wouldn’t it?

But would it also ease your pain or help your recovery?

No, it won’t.

Trust me, it won't.

On the contrary, actually.

Let me tell you something:

There is NOTHING your Ex can say to you in a phone call or text (or personally) that would reduce your pain in the long run.

They can only make it worse.

You DON’T want to know how they are doing (it is more than you can handle).

Also, NOTHING that you do or say will impress or endear them to you.

This is a fact that is very difficult to accept.

How the No Contact Rule Works

Just to reiterate:

No Contact means entirely NO CONTACT with your Ex, either personally, by phone, through social media, email, or short message.

It means NO Facebook stalking, NO phone harassing and NO parking/driving in front of their house.

Big NO, NO, NO to any of that.

You do this for a full 60 days.

(If you need daily motivation for doing this, you can subscribe to my free newsletter.)

But what do you do when it’s really getting tough, when missing your Ex becomes so unbearable that you pick up the phone and are about to call?

No Contact Help: How to Get Through

Three proven methods will help you stay strong during that time:

1. Distraction

The human brain can only concentrate on one thing at a time. So, if you are about to contact your Ex, have a list of prepared distractions ready that you can put into action immediately.

The best options are things where your brain is involved, where it has to figure out something. For example, do research on a specific topic, take quizzes, try puzzles, etc.

The more work your brain has to do, the better the distraction.

2. Call a Friend

When you are close to calling your Ex, call a close friend or a relative instead — a so-called No-Contact Buddy.

They will talk you out of it, as well as some sense into you.

3. Post HERE!

Let ME be your No-Contact Buddy.

Post in the comment section below:

  • Your No Contact Count (in days).
  • Everything you want to say to your Ex — just get it out of your system! (No profanities please.)

How to Stay Strong During the No Contact Period

DO NOT CONTACT that Ex, put it all here! Unload all your anger and longing into our comment section.

By sharing your No Contact struggle with the LovesAGame Community, two things will happen:

  1. You will find that the need for contacting your Ex will be much less.
  2. The replies of other readers will give you hope and strength.

Having said that, now it’s your turn. Post below and let’s help each other.

Your No-Contact Buddy,
Eddie Corbano

  • my ex walked out on me 8 weeks ago withdrawing an offer on our new house behind my back let the solicitor tell me we had split up and he disappeared. He was in touch a week later saying he couldn’t stop thinking about me that he loved me missed me and only wants me, after spending the night together he went So cold and said he was confused. He asked me to go away with him a few days later which I agreed and he then completely ignored me. I messaged him after a few days saying I Couldn’t let him hurt me anymore. That was 2 weeks ago and I am really struggling as I honestly thought he would have been in contact with me before now. I have to stop myself daily texting him to tell him that I Miss him. This breakup was completely out of the blue as we had just bought a house, he wanted to get married next year. We hadn’t been fighting falling out or not getting on as far as I was aware we were both really happy.

  • Elizabeth says:

    Today is day five of NC. Yesterday he text me that I’m an awesome person and he wishes we could communicate without butting heads. He’s called me annoying and said he didn’t want to be with me and I’m bull headed. He wanted me to change for him. Why couldn’t he just love me for me? I didn’t ask him to change anything for me. The worst part is I still love him and want him back. I know he takes me for granted, I just want to be happy for once.

  • We only dated for 8 months but after 5 long years of dating, after ending a toxic relationship of 6 years, I finally fell in love….fast and hard. I knew there were red flags early on but I thought I could deal with them. We broke up 2 weeks ago just before thanksgiving. I tried to do no contact 5 days ago but failed miserably today. Trust me, it definitely made things worse. Starting no contact as of today. I’m ready to move on but still not sure if she might contact me in the future.

  • We broke up a month ago. He texted me two weeks later and we talked very briefly. I blocked him after that. We were together for three years. He said I was the love of his life. He was mine too. I love him to death, but the relationship was so toxic. I know I wasn’t happy with him, but without him I don’t feel anything at all. Everyone who’s going through this, please, choose yourself this time.

  • My partner and I of 2 years broke up about a week ago. I’m 17 he’s 18. We were living together for about 6 months. He got out of prison after 3 weeks. We were together in person and then his brothers came to get him because he and his family were going out of town to see his other siblings. I was Abit agitated that he was going cause he was leaving me. He was hugging me, kissing me all up, telling me he loves me etc. I told him to go and message me when he’s there. That was algood that was the last day I saw him physically. Then he gets down there. His family has real bad drug problems, as do most of my family. We are video calling one night and I fall asleep. When I wake up at about 2am he’s accusing my dad of raping me saying that he could hear us when it’s bullshit. He has a bad grudge against my dad because my dad gave him a big hiding 😔 my dad has a meth problem. He’s now accusing me of hooking up w my dad when that’s no true he’s just using that against me. I vc him the other night his eyes huge I know my ex partner Is also using meth 😔 he was so loving to me when he left now hes just accusing me of something that’s not true and won’t let go of it or change his mind. He went to a party and was texting me all night we even called at about 1am. He said that his family had left him there. I was sketchy why he would stay there when his family left. It’s either for drugs or sex. Then the other day he told me straight up that he was cheating on me. A few hours later he said he was just testing me and that he’s never cheated on me ever, yet he adds other girls on FB. He acts like he has no interest in me. I tried NC but he keeps messaging and I keep replying it’s so hard not to 😭 I miss him so much I cry every night to myself because idk why he’s doing this. He was so good when he left me in person now he’s acting like he hates me. The other night he messaged me saying he loves me he wishes we could be together for the rest of our lives but now he’s acting cold. I want to do NC but do I just seen him when he texts? I don’t want to block him. I’m so attached to him I can’t let go I loved him with everything how could he just act so heartless 💔

  • I just broke it off with someone with who I was excited to build a life. We started down a toxic path after he told me twice in the first year that he needed to end things before his urge for something new starts and I get hurt. He changed his mind the next day, both times. Both times I let him back in, thinking he deserves another chance. Since then, I haven’t been able to fully trust his “urge” won’t come back. Deep down, I get angry with him. So, I finally told him exactly how I felt – that deep down inside I feel it won’t work. I cut him off from texting or coming to talk. I keep getting urges to apologize and give it another shot, knowing it isn’t the right thing. I need help. Why is it so difficult and hurts so much if it’s not right?

  • Today is Day 1 of my NC. Broken NC at least 5 times and each time caused me more sorrow. Now my distraction is following Tottenham since Mourihno became their coach.. hope I can resist replying my ex..

    • Hello John. Don’t be too hard on yourself. It’s not easy

    • I hope the special one provides a good distraction. He certainly is a character!

  • My ex and I broke up on Sunday and I have went no contact since Sunday. She says she doesn’t have the same feelings as I do and that I am a great guy and every other break up thing that could be said. She offered friendship and I said no and that I want no contact at all. I told her from the beginning if we split that friendship wouldn’t be an option.

    I have stood by my word and I need to reverse the power struggle but I am more pissed that she said she never trusted anything I said or did. I am a firm believer in actions speak louder than words. I know going no contact is going to help but today I was weak and drove past her house after work. I am currently unable to talk to my friends about my struggle due to my best friend telling me that he doesn’t want to hear about it. I have been strong since the breakup and I feel damn good and confident but…. I need support

  • I’m only in the beginning of no contact. I’ve put my wife through hell, in one way or another, until she had enough. While I never “hurt” or threatened to hurt her, her fear made her place a protective order on me.

    I suffer with mental illness, borderline personality order, to be exact. It took years to finally identify this, and I started to get specific help, but time ran out.

    I’m as determined as ever to become a new man. Not just for my wife, but for my daughter and me.

    She says she wants a divorce and that she has no more energy for this relationship.

    I don’t want to lose her. I know I can be the husband she deserves if I get another chance.

    So, what do I do when I want to respect her need for space, but I don’t want to “move on”? I don’t want to get over her, but be a better me?

  • I loved him all my life. My first love. My sweetest Love. I saw him again after 39 years. My love for him still as beautiful as it was after all these years.
    He asked me to marry him and of course I said yes. I was that young girl again in love with my sweetest Love. I adored him charised him he took my breath away.
    He moved in then shortly after moved out because I did something petty he didn’t like. Moved back in moved back out moved back in moved back out. The three times I took him back because I loved him. I chose not to see what he was doing because I loved him. I did the no contact I was doing good.
    Then I received a card from him asking for the ring. I wanted so much for him to say I’m sorry that he was wrong but he didn’t. In his mind he has done nothing wrong.

  • broke it off with my ex due to small disagreements that turned HUGE and harsh words spoken, then lies and suicide threats. says he will change but he hasnt yet, still hard to walk away and zero contact after four years

  • I am so sad. My days have been filled with literally hours of conversation. And now there is none. I am really struggling.

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