In my work with people who suffer from a break up or divorce there is one question which is mostly asked first: How long will it take to get over it? How long will the pain last? Sometimes it seems so unbearable that you cannot imagine your life ever to be happy again. I will tell you something that you already feel is true inside of you, but your analytic mind doesn’t allow you to acknowledge: You will be happy again.

Healing a broken heart from a lost love seems to be the most challenging venture one could imagine. A break up usually starts with a phase of paralyzing shock then turns into helplessness and deep grief. It appears impossible to ever be happy again. Wouldn’t it be good if there was a secret how to get over a break up?

Years back, at the time when I was really down - I was left just before marriage, devastated, lost my direction and joy in life - I received a mysterious letter. It came in a beige envelope with nothing on it but my handwritten name.

Let me tell you a little story. There was this guy. Let’s call him Simon. Simon is a quite handsome guy. A lot of women were interested in him and wanted to meet him. He sure was enthusiastic about that, the only problem was: he didn’t knew what to do when he was on a date.

The inevitable question that always rises in your mind sooner or later when you suffer from a break-up is: Am I the only one? And is my pain the most intense? To not keep you in suspense, the answer of course is no, you are not alone.